Have you had
If yes, how many experiences? One approx. 24 yrs. ago involving my father, and at least six within the last six 1/2 months involving my daughter who was killed in a Jeep crash. of my daughter.
Relation of deceased to you: Father
Do you have any comments about the relationship you had with the deceased: I didn't know him well. He and my mother had a bad marriage, and he didn't spend a lot of time at home. They eventually divorced and I rarely saw him.
Age of deceased at time of death: 46
Date of experience: 1978
Was the date of the experience significant in any way? critical time in life, contemplating suicide.
Your age at time of experience: 15
Details of location of experience and your activity at the time of experience: I was asleep.
Have you had
I was going through an unusually bad time
in my life (for my age group) and was contemplating suicide. My life was in the
gutter it seemed, and with no hope for the future. I was in a severe depression
for quite a while until one night when I went to sleep. Sometime in the late
morning hours while I was asleep I went "somewhere". A man who I had
never seen before appeared to me and told me that someone wanted to talk to me.
He took me to a place in a split second (no tunnels) and we were outside of a
white "gate" where another man was standing, he was doing something,
but I don't know what. The man at the gate seemed to know why I was there, but I
still didn't. Then the man who came and got me told me to come with him. I
wasn't at all scared, this place was very calm and peaceful, and I knew no one
was going to hurt me, and for some reason I was glad to be there. We were
walking, and I was looking at the surroundings in awe, everything was perfect.
Everything was a subtle gleaming white, the ground below me was almost iridescent,
and there were several other things that were gleaming white, but I didn't know
what they were. The were some people milling about, and as I watched them I
thought they were "working", attending to some sort of business. They
didn't tell me, but I knew I was nothing "new" there, they knew why I
was there but they didn't care. The man I was walking with wasn't saying
anything, and I could see we were being approached by another man. When he got
about 10 feet from me I was stunned to realize that he was my father, I had
forgotten what he looked like up until that point, and double stunned to see how
short he was and how small his "bone structure" was. (When I was
little, he looked like he towered over me.) But it was him, and I could see that
he was still "alive", just as he always was. The only thing I couldn't
figure out was why he summoned me there, which I knew he did, and why God
allowed it. The following is most (if not all) of the conversation that took
He said "You know who I am."
"yes." I said
"How are you doing?"
"I wanted to see you because I know you are going through a hard time
and I'm worried about you."
(I didn't answer him.)
"How is your mother?" he asked.
I said "She's okay."
(He then asked me about my brothers and sister and I answered him,
wondering why I was there. He then starts to talk about my mother again, who he
had left years earlier even though he battled cancer for years prior to
"I want you to know that I always loved your mother." he said.
"I wasn't perfect when I was there. I was sick and so was she, and we
couldn't take care of each other. We were hurting each other. Life was very
hard, but it's easy here, not like it was there...... It's not your time to come
(I didn't answer but I knew why I was there at this point.)
Dad: "I know how hard your life has been, but it's why we're there, to
experience the things that we can't experience here.
My life was hard and I suffered with cancer, and this is my reward, but I
came here when I was finished there. You have a lot to do yet, a lot of years
left to accomplish things and grow older. It's different here, there is no
weather, it's never cold or hot, there's no night and day, there is no fighting,
no pain, ....there is nothing bad here. I suffered so much pain with cancer, but
once I left, it was gone...."(I could see and feel what he was talking
about, and I would have stayed if I could have.) Someday, when your life is
finished there, this is where you'll be, this is what you're working for. I want
you to go back and I will see you again someday, but not until the time is
right. You have a lot to do yet."
I understood his every sentence with its full meaning. I thought to myself
'go back and finish your life so you can get back here.'
The man who brought me there instinctively came over.
"Tell your brothers and sister I said hi." he said. I told him I
would and I said bye to him. I knew for sure he would still be there and I would
see him again.
We went back to the gate and when I went through it I opened my eyes and I
was wide awake in my bed looking at the ceiling.
Everything written here is true, but may not be in the chronological order
of what was said. Obviously he did all the talking, I didn't know him well. I
can still envision and feel it as if it happened yesterday, the color and the
peace cannot realistically be described. It is something that does not exist for
us here, their world is not like our world.
If you heard a voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar to the voice or sound the deceased made when they were alive? the same
How clearly did you hear the deceased? very, as if he were here with me right now
Is there any possibility that what you heard was from any other source in the surroundings at the time of your experience? not a chance
Did you see the deceased? Yes
Describe the appearance of the deceased: I had only a vague memory of what he looked like until I saw him again. We had no pictures, and I had only seen him a couple of times within the last five years of his life, the last two times were within the last few months of his life. (I was 11 years old when he passed on.)
How clearly did the deceased appear? As clearly as if he was sitting next to me.
How much of the deceased did you see? All of him.
Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died? The same age as when he died.
How healthy did the deceased appear to be? Very healthy.
Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in your surroundings at the time of your experience? No possibility.
Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased? upbeat, concerned.
Describe: upbeat, concerned.
Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know? Yes. He reiterated what I was already seeing and feeling.
How do you currently view the reality of your experience: Experience was definitely real
Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience: I was very calm even though I didn't know where I was or why I was there. And then stunned when I first saw him. I knew I was alive and I was thinking "What I am doing here?" During the experience, I've never experienced that kind of calm or peace, not before or since then.
I know without a doubt that a better life exists outside our world. After that experience, I wished that I could rush through this life to get there. I couldn't wait to get there, but I knew that it was not an option for me anymore.
Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience? Yes
Describe: All thoughts of suicide vanished.
Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.? Yes
Describe: Definitely. I knew for sure that God exists, I knew for sure that when I died I would not be "dead". I knew that I did not have to be perfect and that if I made mistakes during my life here, I would not be condemned to hell. (My grandparents were very religious, and I was very afraid of hell when I was very young.)
Did you see a light? Yes
The brightest bright, but not blinding.
Did you meet
or see any other beings other than the deceased?
I don't know who they were. They were
Did you have any sense of altered space or time?
There was no "time" there as we
know it here.
Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or
I knew that this was going to be
"hard knocks" here. That "place" was the reward for living
in this world and doing the best we can here.
Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience? Yes
I was more upbeat, my depression lifted.
Has the experience affected your relationships?
Daily life? Religious
practices etc.? Career choices?
It was difficult that time actually. I
couldn't tell anyone out of fear of what they would think. After a few years,
life basically went back to normal until my daughter was killed this past June.
And then I questioned my own experience until I had an ADC (from either God or
my daughter) about 1 1/2 days after her death. If people who have crossed over
actually have a "life review", it was from my daughter. If not, it was
Have you shared this experience with others?
They know me, so they didn't doubt me.
Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience? Uncertain
Yes, but a combination of this experience
and ADC's with my daughter. The ADC with my father was too long ago, so the
effect of it wore off in a sense. Once my daughter was killed, the combination
is too strong for me to go back to thinking of just the here and now.