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Experience description:    

      I live in Denver and have for the last 25 years.  My adoptive parents were transferred here in the middle of my senior year in high school.  When my grandmother who had stayed in Illinois got to sick to live alone, my parents moved her here to Denver .  After 16 years of living here, my parents moved with my grandmother back to Illinois and I stayed here.

My grandmother continued to get sicker and sicker until she was placed in a nursing home. On Friday Feb 19th, 1993 , I woke up and felt as if my Grandmother was with me in the room. I had a couple of hours before I had to be at work so I went and bought her a very sentimental card to express to her how I had always felt about her. I wrote her a short note and addressed the envelope, intending to send it to her on Saturday. While I was at work that afternoon, my mother called and told me that Grandma had passed away that morning. I wasn't able to go to her memorial, and felt awful for not being able to say good-bye.

On Saturday, I told my husband to be and kids to please go do something, I wanted to be alone.   I was laying on the couch in the living room when I felt my grandmother. I felt her sit down on the couch with me, grab my hand and tell me it was okay and she had come to say good-bye to me since I could not be there to tell her good-bye.  It was as real as holding my husbands or children's hands and I have never had another moment of regret for not saying good-bye because in our own way we  did.

I have visited with her on at least 6 other occasion and each one leaves me with a profound sense of calmness and happiness

Did you sense an awareness or presence of the deceased without actually seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling them ?  No
Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?  Yes
Did the voice or sound seem to originate externally, or outside of you, inside of you, or did you not hear a voice or sound but had a knowing of what was communicated?  sense of knowing
Is there any possibility that what you heard was from any other source in the surroundings at the time of your experience?  no

Was there any possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience?  no

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?  Yes

Where and how were you touched?  on the hand

Was the touch familiar?  familiar

Is there any possibility what you felt was from any other source present in your surroundings at the time of your experience?  no

Did you see the deceased?  No

How long did the experience last?  5-10 minutes

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?  gradual

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?  happiness
Describe:  happiness
Your beliefs currently regarding your fear of death:  Not fearful

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:  Experience was definitely real        

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:  peaceful, calm, relief

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?  Yes
Describe:  i never again felt bad about not being at her service

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?  No

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?  No comment
      Describe:  i have had out of body all my life

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?  Yes

      Describe:  there in no death

Has the experience affected your relationships?  Daily life?  Religious practices etc.?  Career choices?  calmer, less reactive to negative people or situations

Have you shared this experience with others?  Yes

      Describe:  a good friend of mine totally believes me and supports me in every way

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?  No

What emotions/feelings did you experience following your experience?

What was the best and worst part of your experience?
  no worst part, everything about every visit with my grandmother had been positive