Did the ADC Really Happen?

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READER:  How do I know that the experience was real and how do I communicate with my loved ones again? 

First of all, thanks for sharing your experience.  As you know, we are researching answers to questions such as you pose.  We highly encourage people to share via the webform http://www.adcrf.org/forms/ADCRFShare.php in order to better understand the ADC phenomena.    We really don't have enough data to answer your question scientifically.  I do know that many ADCs occur in all states, such as the dream state, the waking state, the meditative state, and etc.  I also have a good understanding of how we process information and how we access memories. 
However, many questions on classifications of states and whether or not communications from the other side are authentic, still are fairly subjective.  And as you recognize, it isn't easy to distinguish the line between reality and wishful thinking.  You'll have to decide that one for yourself. 

ADCs seem to be a gift to the recipient on earth to tell them that life goes on, and in most cases, it is much better than when the deceased person was here on earth. 

One of the more interesting things about studying ADCs is the aftereffects when the living person integrates such events with their every day reality.  As you are now doing, you are making some large leaps and bounds into the spiritual arena - you are asking questions and wanting to learn more about life and death.  The path will take you in some very amazing directions.  The person you are now, will not be the same in a year from now.  That is spiritual growth.  Had your life remained static, you probably would not have grown as much or in this particular direction.
I have many readers that tell me about searching in various areas.  They immerse themselves in reading books, meditation, nature, religious pursuits, or taking classes on psychic phenomena such as out of body experiences.  Please recognize that this list is not all-inclusive, just suggestions.  Another good thing to do is to look at the other two websites that we have www.nderf.org and www.oberf.org All three websites give a rounded picture of what the consciousness is and how it appears in different states. 
There are no quick and easy answers that are right for everyone.  I have given you some options - now you can pick which one you are most likely to benefit the most from.
Good Luck in you search!
Take care,
Jody Long, Webmaster