In the year 2015 I had shared my near-death experience and some other experiences. But today I'm writing what I experienced with my deceased husband. With this I'm going farther back. He had been my adored second husband, friend, consultant and healer. Healer in the sense, that after my work he could heal my stomach pain with his hands. At the time I still didn't know what his hands radiated so that my pain subsided. Well! He was 24 years older, with an amputated right lower leg, and had much experience. In December 1993 he didn't feel well physically, so that we went to our family doctor, who sent him to many of his fellows, who didn't find any malignant symptom. When the results showed up at the family physician's, we went to see him. 'You are in perfect health' he meant. But I felt and was aware that my husband was coming down with something. On New Years Eve he then fell head first in the bathtub, and after that wanted to go straight to bed. He hadn't touched a drop of alcohol, not even at zero time, to toast the new year; he refused alcohol. Towards morning he was lying in bed agitated, and when I asked him, 'What's wrong?' he answered, everything is fine! When I looked under his cover he was wrapping his urine in his nightgown, so that the bed would not be soiled. He had not been able to grab the urine bottle at the side of his bed. When I lifted his body while trying to take off his wet night gown, he screamed so loud 'What are you doing?' that I still feel the fright today. 'What do you have my Sternchen (little star)?' 'Nothing', he said, 'Everything is fine'. He didn't get up, didn't want to eat nor drink, and that was an alarm signal for me. As the emergency physician's phone was occupied three times, I called the fire department. At once they where there and took my beloved husband to the hospital. I drove behind them. It was on Jan. 01, 1994 that I learned from the hospital doctor, 'Your husband has lung cancer. Incurable! He will not get well anymore. There's no hope.' And he showed me at the pictures of the CT scan, why he fell head first into the tub. On his right side water had been gathering and the weight made that he lost balance, and fell into the tub because he was at the bathroom. This news was my second biggest shock in life. Until 22:00 pm they performed tests on him, and I stayed at his side until he was brought to bed. I shortened my working time in order to be as often as possible with my husband. I assumed his personal hygiene, went with him to radiation and pushed him with his wheel chair around hospital. But one day at the business an inner agitation overwhelmed me. Then I started to cry. It was at 14:00 pm. I was upset, running back and forth and said: 'I need to see him!' Suddenly an inner voice told me: 'You will be too late! You will be too late!' It got more alarming, insisted: 'You will be too late! You will be too late!' My heart and head vibrated from fear. And so I was driving my car at high speed via the city highway, and talked to 'Sternchen', (that's how I called him): 'Please wait, soon I will be with you!' I kept repeating this sentence: 'I'll be soon with you please wait for me!' Arriving at hospital I was running like hell over the area towards the cancer house. As I opened the door I called happily: 'Sternchen, I'm here!' When he heard my voice and saw me, he was surprised and looked at me big eyed in wonderment. And I also was astonished, because he was sitting so happy in his bed. My heart opened from exuberance, that I wasn't too late. He couldn't grasp how it came that I was suddenly there in front of him, like a ghost. With this he took my hands strongly in his, kissed them and said: ' Where are you coming from so fast my doll (that's how he called me). 'I just talked to you and now you are standing here in front of me. How is this possible?'. We embraced full of wonderment and held each other a long time, so that we could hear our heart beats, until he said: We love each other so much, that we can be aware and feel each other in the distance, my dear doll.' 'And because we love each other so much, I apparently heard you talking, so that I set forth to see you.' After that we kissed softly, before he was caressing my hands a last time and said: 'This is almost like a miracle, my dear doll. I want that you are looking for another husband and that you are making him as happy, as I was allowed to be at your side. Please promise this to me!' 'No, in no way!' 'Please promise', and he was laying his open hand in front of me. 'Please promise my dear doll!' At that I smacked my hand in his. 'You are feeling excellent today my Sternchen.' 'Yes maybe I can go home soon.' 'Well then I will go and see the doctor and ask him about.' 'Okay, go along, I will rest a while in the meantime', where his last words. And the doctor explained matter of factly: 'This is only a short flaring up before the end is coming. Don't get wrong hopes, your husband will not get well!'
It was only three weeks since he had been accepted at the hospital. Back with Sternchen a nurse was giving him a shot. He never woke up. I was standing there transfixed and the nurse meant: 'You can still talk to your husband, as you normally did. He is aware of you.' A strange feeling came over me, that I couldn't do anything anymore for my beloved husband, except being a solo entertainer. I still wanted to tell you so many things, but didn't get the chance to do, or didn't want to get it. When you leave this planet my love, you will float along in a wonderful, harmonious, calm and quiet World. You will meet a new wonder, that will never exist on earth; paradise! I'm telling you because I was to know this heavenly world, in the cosmic sphere, during my near-death experience. This was my most beautiful gift. All this I wanted to tell you, but I didn't dare as you might have laughed at me and say I was nuts. Then my husband was hastily transported into another room, and the doctor meant:' A woman is as in a hurry as her husband.' 'Why where you in such a hurry Sternchen?' In the other room I complained. 'What am I doing without you? Who will now soothe my stomach pain? Why do you leave me alone, and you just go? What will I do without you? At this I was crying hard. With hindsight this scene was very disagreeable for me. It was neither fitting nor fairylike. I cannot say what made me behave like this in front of him. I was lamenting that I would be alone, when he died. 'Please Sternchen forgive me that I lost my countenance'. At that I laid my forehead on his hand. 'I'm sorry please forgive me.'
Suddenly in a split second and in colors from light to mid pink, I saw something sliding from his feet over the body, up towards his head and then it disappeared.
I immediately stopped crying and thought: 'What was this?' Quickly I looked at his face, where a tear was running from his eyes. His skin was even, without wrinkles. He had died - and I remained totally calm. Why? How could it be that I suddenly remained very serene and wasn't crying anymore. He being dead I should have been crying so much, wetting many tissues, and drowning in my tears. 'In my heart you hold a strong space. Never had I believed that I would loose you this way. I love you my Sternchen!'. I caressed his one more time and said: 'In the other world you won't need any morphine'. Then I rang the bell. With total calm I was running to my car and drove home serenely, shedding no tear anymore. When I opened the door, I got a different feeling as in the previous days, where I sensed the rooms as cold and empty. On this evening I put his lower limb prosthesis in a plastic bag and put it near the door, to bring it to the patient care location in the morning. There the ladies where quite occupied, and ignored me. As it took too long, before any of them lifted their heads, I said:' My husband died. Here are his aids.' At that I held the plastic bag up. Thunderstruck they opened their eyes, and looked at me as if I had killed him. On the street I thought about this strange scene, and also about my almost mechanical behavior, as Sternchen only died the day before, and here I already got rid of his aids. Why was I so in a hurry? Above all how casual and easy I behaved, this didn't fit at all with my character. Why wasn't I crying anymore about Sternchen? Who or what stopped my tear flow? What was the thing that fled his body in a split second? Who could answer all those questions? At the time I was still thinking like that. Death is a big change in a life.
To wallow in pain, was out of question, because when I returned from the institution, Sternchen piped up. While I was sitting at the kitchen table I saw him, standing near the cupboard, propping himself on his left elbow. How is this possible? He is dead! Am I going to be eccentric? Am I seeing ghosts? Am I now ready for the loony bin? All this passed my head, but I felt completely normal, was not seeing ghosts, and was not mentally sick. When he then told me: 'Hurry up otherwise I will get you!' it was clear to me, that here there was something fishy about that. This couldn't be real, and yet it happened. I said: 'Sternchen it's much too early, to look for another man. It's only yesterday that you left me, and the normal grieving time is about a year.' 'You have to stick to your word!' he was talking in an authoritative voice, what I never liked, when he talked like this to me. Once he said to me:' I must not address you in a harsh or loud voice, because then you are contracting like a mimosa.' He reminded me about my promise, that I gave him before he died. In agreeing to his last wish I never suspected, how strong a meaning a word of honor on deathbed had. Then I started crying again. Tear flow came back. I saw him with my eyes closed and in darkness. With bright light he was gone. The next day I had a feeling of not being alone in the house. I was sitting at the kitchen table and waited what was happening to Sternchen. When I started to cry heavily, he was standing at the cupboard and said: 'Hurry up, otherwise I will get you!' 'How is it possible that you are talking to me, if you are dead Sternchen?' Despite all this I remained in the home where we had been living together. After a week I went back to work. Sternchen collected me after work and went back home in the car with me. The first traffic light was red and I stopped. Unexpectedly the motor extinguished. After three trials to restart the car, I was crying enormously. At the fourth trial the car restarted. And I felt that I was not alone in the car. At home I used Sternchen's place at the kitchen table, ate a slice and waited how he would show up. Effectively he was standing against the cupboard and said: 'Hurry up, otherwise I'll get you'. He said this in dead earnest. I cried my eyes out: 'What's this Sternchen? What game are you playing on me?' 'Fulfill your promise!' he claimed without mercy. 'When I'm ready to', I answered,' I will conform to, but in no way as shortly after your death.'
This theater continued for weeks. I wasn't crazy, but something happened to me. The sentence, 'Hurry up, otherwise I will get you' had been hammered downright in my brain, like a publicity, that you can't get rid of, because it is permanently repeated. I was forty-nine, and neither crazy nor known to tell fairy tales. At the same time I dealt alone with all this. I couldn't inform anybody though, as they obviously would declare me certifiably insane. Sternchen's death went to her head they would say. I didn't want letting this coming up. The more that I myself couldn't understand the situation, how could anybody else?
In the aftermath, Sternchen used to go home with me in the car when I left work. At the road entering the highway the traffic light was red and I stopped. There I felt distinctly that he was on the backseat. Suddenly the motor stopped. After three trials it still didn't start. The lights turned green, but the motor wouldn't start. The cars behind me started a chorus of horns - rightly. Instead of starting the car I had cascades falling from my eyes. I even didn't cry as much when Sternchen died. Suddenly I felt a breeze in my neck and he said: ' Now come on start the car, stop crying and look in front of you!' 'Tears are running by themselves, Sternchen, I can't stop them.' Then I started again and the motor came. But the car took on speed only slowly. I looked at the drive way to the highway, it was barred, so I took to the left for the next one. The car wouldn't move easily until I remarked that I had been trying to use third gear to start. 'Such a chaos!' I burst out. Normally I was never that stupid! At the next drive way we were standing in a traffic jam and I reflected about my confusion. The scenes with Sternchen continued day by day, week by week. One evening when he repeated his sentence for the umpteenth time, I opened TV. Finally there was calm. The next days I started TV as soon as I arrived home. So I took no chance to be confronted to the appearance. At night he was standing in the dark beside my bed. I was lying on his mattress and he watched me, so that I slept the whole night with the light on. Days later I went to a card reader. I wanted to solve the riddle about Sternchen. 'Please tell me, should I follow my deceased husband, or rather look for a new partner?' The woman laid out the cards open and said, 'There are three men waiting, but only one of them is honest with you.' And I thought by myself: 'I only need one man.' Then she said: 'It is not good that the deceased is holding on. When did your husband die?' 'Five weeks ago', I answered. 'I feel sorry for you', she said when I left. On the street I thought, 'Why is she feeling sorry for me? She didn't even know me. But now I knew that it was Sternchen who held on to me. Or was it maybe me holding on to him? All this sounded quite absurd to me. How could this work out to hold on to somebody who died? If I only knew! The statement of the woman that a deceased might hold on to a partner, perplexed me somewhat. At home Sternchen was standing at the cupboard and was quiet. What happened? Did he know where I had been? And he didn't repeat the sentence, he usually said. The motor stops at the traffic lights continued, the scenes at home too. But one day the motor struck even before the crossing, so that the car was rolling slowly towards it. From the back seat my husband summoned me severely, 'Start at last, you are jamming the traffic!' 'That's what I do, but the motor won't ignite', I said with tears!' Suddenly anger rose in me, so that I got out of the car, opened the backdoor and yelled aloud:' Go on, get out!' Nobody was sitting there, but at the same time I heard his voice: 'Drop it and start driving!' 'What a shit!' I yelled and smashed the door. I felt quite silly, to open the door of a car and to scream at a 'nothingness'. And I never got the idea that the motor might have a damage, as it started perfectly every morning. I also didn't get the thought to contact a doctor, who perhaps would have diagnosed a psychosis and filled me up with medications, a poison I didn't need. Or would section me right away to the asylum. At work I correctly added the many numbers in the charts.
Since the moment when this 'something' fled the body of Sternchen at lightning speed, and sometimes was hanging around in my proximity, or maybe was fixed somewhere at my body, something happened to me, wherefore I was searching the key, but couldn't find it. Around me phenomenal events happened, that I had no control about. I would have loved to resolve this mystery except that I didn't know how to. I learned Tai-Chi exercises on a Video cassette on a daily basis, because they were calming on my nerves. After work I immediately trained the exercises, in order to give Sternchen no occasion, to hammer his publicity into me. When I trained he watched me. Late at night he then summoned me again: 'Hurry up, otherwise I get you!' ' Yes I'm going to come to you' I said under tears. I really was ready to follow him. At that he was depicting me the way how to, which I saw in front of me: 'Go on the highway and use the exit for Kämmen, where there is a bridge. At the crossing turn the car straight to the bridge, so that the car will fall down on the highway underneath.' I didn't feel any fear. What a wonderful moment it would be, when my soul would leave the body, and would be met by the stillness of paradise. There couldn't be anything more sweet and wonderful. (Today I think it was the soul, the 'knowing self' or the 'energy of consciousness', that knows everything about us).
During my near-death experience I had split in two, in the not moving, not thinking body mass, and the part that was in the lap of the young man, the 'knowing self' or 'energy of consciousness'. Probably Sternchen experienced the same thing, when his knowing self left the body and the body mass remained. But why could I see him and hear his voice? That was the strange thing! He also couldn't answer, but could see everything what I did, where I went, whom I got in contact etc. During my near-death experience the anesthetist called my name, but I couldn't answer, yet could hear him. Why couldn't I answer him? This is still unexplored.
Instead to obey my husband I was driving towards my birthplace. On the highway I love to drive fast. Before passing I looked in all directions, signaled , was already beginning to turn the wheels, when Sternchen suddenly yelled aloud: 'Turn your head to the left!' I startled, looked to the left and there was a black car coming in my dead angle. While I still was alarmed, Sternchen meant: 'That's how fast it can go!' At that I saw his face like in a fog in the left upper corner of the windshield. We looked at each other and I said: 'Your warning came at the last moment. Thank you for saving my life.' At a speed of 160 Km/h an accident could have been fatal. I didn't fear that, but I still had a duty to fulfill. When I parked into the double garage at home, precision and mindfulness was required. Yet my right outside mirror scratched the wall slightly. The scratch was done. Immediately Sternchen was blaming me: 'You have no feeling when it is needed!' 'What, you here again?' I asked him. Probably it should have been like this, when I heard his voice and he was criticizing me.
From now on I didn't want to do without him and got used to these situations. Also, in my parents home I kept silent about these phenomenon. Back in Berlin I was driving on the highway to the north towards Neuzelle with Ilse. And a week later was Sternchen's birthday. At the crossing of Wisbyer Street I took the lane leading to the left. This is a big crossing where cars from all directions are standing at the traffic lights. By green I started, when suddenly on the middle of the crossing the car turned 180°, so that I now faced the cars following me. One driver flipped me the bird, his passenger made a gesture like <cuckoo> and Ilse asked me: 'Have you got your drivers license only yesterday?' ' No I've got it 25 years ago!' My brain signaled 'Back home!' I probably had forgotten something that was more important than this drive today. We continued and I couldn't find the branch - off for Prenzlau, and I took the next exit that went back to Berlin. I was driving three times in circles until I found the branch - off towards Prenzlau. While driving my thoughts rotated about this confusion. My passenger had no driving license and so she wasn't aware, even not when a danger was coming up. When I saw a road works in the distance I wanted to change lanes, but there was another car besides us, and very tightly behind us a tailgater constantly was flashing his lights, while we neared the road works dangerously. Suddenly Sternchen yelled: 'Step on it!' I hit the gas pedal and pulled very neatly in front of the red car, who immediately honked his horn - he was right. My unsuspecting passenger only asked: 'Why is he honking so long?' 'No idea!' I lied, as I didn't want to alarm her. Driving home then went without any problem. I wrote a poem for Sternchen's birthday and was reading it to him at his tomb, on his birthday a week later. When I looked at the date on the tomb, I noticed that I was one week late for his birthday. His birthday had been on the day of our drive to Neuzelle.
The scales fell from my eyes, and I said to him on the tomb: 'Please forgive me Sternchen, that I'm too late for your birthday. And for sure it was you who initiated the commotion during the journey to Neuzelle, because I should have come first to your tomb and only then begin the journey. But why did you confound the date in my brain? Did you want to test me? It's only because of that, that I'm standing here on tomb number four one week later. Of course it was obvious to me that he was near me and listened carefully, what I had to tell him. A workmate told me that she had been visiting a Reiki seminar in Munich during the weekend. My curiosity was raised and on the following weekend I participated in a Reiki seminar in Berlin. This was really so good for me that I kept with this. Here I learned why Sternchen could take away my stomach pain by the laying on of his hands. After five months and ten days of daily meetings with the appearances of Sternchen, I decided to give my life a new direction and went out searching for a man. I'll make it short: After every meeting with a man, I asked Sternchen afterwards: 'Is Helmut the right one?' The answer came promptly: 'He's in a relationship!' So I was done with him. The next man and I made slow contact. When I asked Sternchen at home: ' Is Gunter the right one for me?', he was snickering. 'Why do you laugh that way, Sternchen?' This he could not tell me, but his bitter laughing pointed to something. Only I didn't know about what. After every meeting with Gunter Sternchen's laughing got more grumpy, but I couldn't make out why he gave me this laugh, that I hadn't known of him when he was alive. Time will show, I thought. With Gunter I experienced great passion and stayed with him. Four weeks later I went with him visiting his mother, but asked Sternchen again: 'Is Gunter the right one for me?', again this bitter laughing. Nevertheless we went to a flower shop. Gunter was staying in the car, and I chose various flowers. The vendor said: I'll bind them into a nice bouquet. I was standing alone in the shop and suddenly I started to cry. 'What is happening to me?' Then I heard Sternchen: 'Stop crying now, what will the vendor think about?' 'Why just here in this shop Sternchen?' I asked and then I saw something escaping in a split second from my head through my body and passing out through my feet. This happened with the same speed, as at the time when it left Sternchen. Same as when I turn on an electric switch and the light is on. As from that second Sternchen didn't show himself anymore. After half a year I got to feel what his bitter laughing wanted to tell me, I had fallen in love with an addict, who also died five years later. And I stepped into fringe sciences and remained single. Today I'm alone, happy, healthy and free. In my biography 'Unwanted birth' I have been writing extensively about my life. I thank you for your attention and remain yours sincerely Mrs. AL.
On an early morning at four I couldn't sleep anymore. The moon looked through
the window, and I suddenly started to breath deeply, automatically and like
having been wound up, without
following a special breathing rhythm and without pauses. It didn't take long
before I found myself in a hypnotic state, what had in no way been my intention.
Then my right leg became as heavy as lead, then the left one, not as heavy as
the right one, just heavy. I continued breathing without controlling the pace.
With this I saw my 'self', it was wearing a lower leg prosthesis on the right
leg. Then my arms became heavy and heavier and I started to breath even faster.
Unexpectedly I saw my mother and then myself as an embryo in her womb. My self
was looking on me as an embryo from the outside. It was seeing the arms, legs
and the head. At this the embryo heard it's heartbeat pumping calmly and
regularly. My self never heard it's heart beating as distinctly. I kept
breathing strongly without taking a break. Suddenly I wasn't perceiving my
limbs, the trunk and the head anymore, except for the right leg with the
prosthesis, which wasn't detaching.
Then 'I' (my real self) saw, the war and the hospital
at my birthplace, where mother was in labor and was moaning. Houses were
burning, black smoke rose and the wind was blowing the flames high and far.
Within the black smoke people were screaming and fled the fire. No firefighter
was extinguishing the fire. People screamed, cried and ran away. Suddenly I - in
the form of my true self - looked towards a young man, early twenties, who was
lying on the ground with only one leg. A nurse went towards him, passed by him
without helping. She fled the fire and the smoke. The young man was burning, and
she simply passed by him without helping; to watch that hurt me - my self - very
much. Suddenly I my true self, saw the First World War and I asked: 'What year
do we have?' '1917', said a young soldier wearing a black pike helmet. He looked
at me but said nothing. And I saw on the front of his helmet a golden
decoration. The soldier left and I watched him leaving. Suddenly a very loud
bang - an explosion. The soldier fell. And as he wasn't getting up, I ran
towards him. Blood was seeping
through his uniform and he didn't move. For sure he was dead. But this couldn't
be possible; firstly the young man who
at the Second World War was lying on the ground burning, and then the
soldier who died from a grenade in the First World War? Between both wars there
were at least twenty years! Maybe the soul or consciousness of the soldier from
the First World War is residing in the burning young man? That's what came into
the mind of my true self. At once I (my self) looked again at the young amputee
in World War II, how his body kept burning and he said: 'I have no pain.' But
the simple view of the charred young man, was hurting my real self so hard, that
it had pain everywhere and it was crying. Then my self heard my mother screaming
her labor pain. It happened in the early morning of a day in May 1944. I, my
true self looked again towards the charred young man, who could hardly be
recognized as a human being. And this view hurt so much, that I was crying and
sobbing. Suddenly my true self looked on itself from outside, saw the mouth, the
chin and the left cheek collapsing in fast forward into a mummy. Fear
of being truly dead was flowing through my self. From the outside my true
self looked to it's own body, lying on the mattress, devoid of feeling and mind.
I, my true self looked again to the charred man. He was dead. Then it looked
again toward it's own body, where the heart was lying on top and was pumping
calmly. The body could not be felt nor perceived. Inside of mother the amniotic
sac was broken, and with me, the real self, the bladder opened also. As a fetus
I pushed against a wall until my head hurt and I cried. Back there was a bright
hole, far away, but I wanted to go there. Suddenly I slipped out there, freezing
very much, crying and screaming. I, my true self, was born. And my true self
looked down on itself as a baby, freezing, crying and screaming. Diagonally from
above a voice said: ' I have no pain; I'll stay with you.' As a baby my navel
hurt so much that I had stopped breathing and just cried and screamed, at once
the same voice, but now inside of the baby said :'I'll stay with you.' 'Don't
stop breathing. Don't forget to breathe!' my real self kept repeating, and I was
breathing strongly in and out. Then the upper jaw and the lower jaw of the baby
hurt very much. It was crying and crying so that I stopped breathing. With this
the voice in the baby said: 'Breathe, breathe, go on! Breathe!' My real self
also had stopped breathing, and after waking the baby, my real self was also
breathing strongly again. As a baby, I was seeing as if I was looking through
frosted glass. My real self was looking at it's own heart which, while lying
outside on top of the body, with all its strong and thin veins, was pumping
regularly and calmly. The heart looked smaller as I thought. Suddenly my real
self became very scared that it might be really dead. 'Breathe, breathe,
breathe! Don't forget breathing!', the voice now said from above in the room.
The lifeless body was lying on the mattress and my real self was looking down
from the outside on itself. Then I, my real self was breathing in and out
strongly. Then this same voice said: 'Welcome in the new homeland!' And my self
heard, you are dead, like at the time of your near-death experience. Quickly my
self asked: 'What is it that has separated from my body before death?' 'Well
it's consciousness, of course', came a disappointed answer, as if I had not
known it. 'Consciousness?' repeated my real self. On the mattress was my
lifeless bio mass, and consciousness was floating in the room, while the heart
as the only organ was lying on top, where consciousness looked down at it, as it
pumped calmly and regularly. Now I was extremely scared being really dead, and
started to breath constantly and heavily through my open mouth. When expiring I
was moaning and sobbing. Suddenly I felt that I was crying effectively and that
the tears were running into my ears. My mind was back in my head. Feelings took
longer, until consciousness was sending them back to the body. My near-death
experience had happened the same way, where the body had been on the mattress
and couldn't feel the hitting of the anesthetist. And now I also couldn't feel
my body. It was on the mattress conscienceless, and consciousness was looking at
it, same way as during the near-death experience. Firstly mind got back in my
head, where it belonged, so that I could think clearly again. And my mind said:
'I'm alive! - That's good.' Slowly I started to move my heavy limbs, with the
right leg as heavy as lead. Feelings, mobility, my inner vitals, came back only
slowly. This experience showed me distinctly, that consciousness is containing
mind and feelings, and that immediately before death it is disappearing from the
body in a split second. Consciousness has lived ever before and will never die -
and that's everlasting life.
Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience? No
Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes …..Because I was no more myself, because the deceased had been interfering with my life.
At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event? No
What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience? Fear of death.
Was the experience dream like in any way? None. I knew them all.
Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body? No
What emotions did you feel during the experience? No
Did you see a light? No
Did you meet or see any other beings? No
Did you experiment while out of the body or in another, altered state? Yes
Seeing, feeling, perceiving, hearing, smelling, as described.
Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later? Yes World War I, World War II, my birth.
Did you notice how your 5 senses were working, and if so, how were they different? Yes … encompassing the whole world. Everybody can do that if he is dealing with that. He will also get a good insight into neurosciences. Everything is connected with everything. When we close our eyes and see something, who is looking for us? I'm traveling through my body and can look at my organs, who's then looking for me, consciousness.
Did you have any sense of altered space or time? No
Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose? Yes I am able to travel over continents and help, if the concerned person is accepting it. With a bit of training everybody can do that.
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No
Did you become aware of future events? Yes We all have those gifts that want to be roused. Just train with much patience and then do it, is for everybody.
Were you involved in or aware of a decision regarding your return to the body? Yes The attitude towards life has changed. I only listen to my conscience or the knowing self, what knows everything about me; what to do or to let.
Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience? No At childhood there was implanted in us a faith of church. Later I understood that all this is a humbug and I broke away from it. My life I live it by myself. Am collecting experiences for the next generation. I no more won't let anybody set up boundaries for me that will encumber my life.
How has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices? Career choices? The best, the near-death experience, it was a gift for my life. The worst, not to know.
Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes You can only give back, what you truly and really experienced.
Have you shared this experience with others? When my consciousness or the knowing self will reincarnate again, then I will start my life in another way, than to connect it with materialism. The fine aspect, the unseen, which doesn't need any proof, what we let wither in us, it's with that, that I will start life.
What emotions did you experience following your experience? I got more sensitive with feelings, hearing and more discernible.
What was the best and worst part of your experience? No
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience? I'm happy that somebody came up with the idea for these questions and put them in the internet. I would be ready to exchange views in German language, I wrote two books, where everything can be read that I divulged here. 1. Biography 'Ungewollt geboren' (Unwanted birth), 2. 'Leben -Tod - Spiritualität' (Life - death - spirituality), Author unknown.