Bess M's ADC

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  Experience description:

In my experience with Mike, we had a huge fight the last time I had seen him alive.  We never made up.  In the dream, I went to this little white bungalow, with a perfectly manicured lawn and it was beautiful and sunny outside.  Mike came to the door and let me in.  He then gave me a hug and told me that he was sorry for fighting with me.  He said he forgave me and I should know deep down that he did not hate me.

We sat and drank coffee, then he told me he wanted me to meet some of his friends.  He introduced me to some people, then we went back in the house.  Mike then patted my stomach and told me congratulations on my pregnancy.  He then said "Your son is going to be healthy and beautiful.  Don't worry, I'll be taking care of you guys".  He then asked me to keep an eye on his widow, who was also a good friend.  He then said he was off to play a round of golf and left.

Background information:

Details of location of experience and your activity at time of experience (for example: sleeping, in reading in bed in bedroom, at funeral of deceased, driving a car to work, cooking in kitchen, etc.):      In all three experiences I was sleeping and they came to me in what I thought were dreams

             Degree of bereavement for deceased immediately prior to the experience (choose
            best response):               Severe sadness and/or grief feelings

             Degree of alertness immediately prior to experience (choose best response):          
             Asleep

After your experience, did you consider the contents of your experience:       Mixed

Length of time between death of deceased and your experience:          7 months

Have you had multiple experiences?   Yes  ,  4

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words?        Yes   Because people who do not believe in this label you as a quack and think you need to be committed

Did you ONLY sense an awareness or presence of the deceased without actually seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling them?  No

Did you see the deceased?   Yes   He looked just like any time I ever saw him alive

How clearly did the deceased appear (i.e. solid, somewhat transparent, etc.):            Clear as a bell

How much of the deceased did you see (i.e. all or part of the deceased):         All of him

Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died?       Appeared to be at the age he died

How healthy did the deceased appear to be?  Did they have any infirmities before they died which might have been apparent or not apparent? Extremely healthy.  His neck was broken in the accident and there were massive cuts, but he appeared perfect

Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           No

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?            No

How long did the experience last?  Just about 5 minutes, like a short movie

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?    gradual

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?    Yes    He just seemed happy

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know?      He referred to my child to be as ""your son"", and at the time, I had not found out the sex of my child.

Your beliefs immediately prior to the experience regarding your fear of death.                Moderately fearful

Your beliefs currently regarding your fear of death.     Moderately fearful

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?   Experience was definitely real

Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:         
I can't explain, but I know it was real

Was the experience dream like in any way?   Yes     I was asleep and it was in a dream

What did you feel (while awake) immediately prior to your experience?    Happy              

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?    Yes   
Because I was upset that I never got to say goodbye to Mike, but in this way I did

What was the best and worst part of your experience?          
That I got a chance to say I'm sorry and to say goodbye

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?   If Yes or Uncertain, describe how.  (For example:  Has the experience affected your relationships?  Daily life?  Religious practices etc.?  Career choices?)                     No

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?                   
The sex of my unborn child    

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?   Yes    That there is some sort of life after death

"Death Compacts" are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have ever made such a compact?           Yes  I told my family that if anything ever happens to me, I will watch over them and make sure they are okay

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?     Yes    I had an ultrasound 2 weeks later and it was confirmed that I was pregnant with a boy.  My son was born on 8-20-01

What emotions did you experience following your experience?      Happiness

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?    Yes       When I have these type of dreams, my husband tells me that I wake up screaming and yelling.  Many times, I do not remember the yelling and screaming, but I do remember the events.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?        No    

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?           No    

Did you become aware of future events? Yes     I knew the sex of my unborn child

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?         Yes    

Did you experience a separation of consciousness from your body?  No    

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?     Yes    
He introduced me to different people, like ""new friends"" he had made

Did you see a light?    No    

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above?          No    

Have you shared this experience with others?   Yes     I told Mike's widow and she was just happy for me to have that chance to communicate with him

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?            No    

Is there anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?  No

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?             Uncertain     I am currently taking Lexapro for anxiety/depression, but at the times of these experiences, I was under no medication

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No    

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?       No 

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?         Yes