Cheryl H's ADC

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Experience description:  

Sandy was close to death.  I opted to go to the store to pick up some things for dinner for all the people that were there at her bedside.  I KNEW when I walked out the door to my car that she was going to die while I was gone.  The store was only a mile away, I only picked up a couple of things and hurried home.  As I was pulling into the parking space back at her house, she died.  A friend answered the door and told me that she had just passed.  I came in and could see that she really was gone.  I went into the kitchen and started cooking spaghetti sauce. 

I heard her voice as clear as a bell say, "Thank you for taking care of my boys".  She was referring to her husband, sons, and 2 very close male friends that were there with her in the end.  The tears burst from me and I whispered, "you're welcome -- I promised."  We had talked about her dying and she asked me to be there when she passed because the "boys" would need me.  I laughed and said, you know me, I'll probably be in the kitchen cooking when you go.  I had completely forgotten that conversation until I heard her voice.  I have told this to a few people, they all said it was my imagination, or just grief.  I assure you, it was NOT!

Was this experience difficult to express in words?  No

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?          Yes

            Describe what you heard, how clearly you heard it and what was communicated:   I heard her voice as clear as a bell say, "Thank you for taking care of my boys".

            Did the voice or sound seem to originate externally or outside of you, inside you, or did you not hear a voice or sound, but had a sense of knowing what was communicated?  It was as if she was standing about 2-3' to my left and about a foot behind me.

            If you heard a voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar from the voice or sound the deceased made when they were alive?           It was her normal speaking voice, but not loud enough that anyone near her body (about 10-15 feet away in the family room) would have heard it.  There was a sense of it being her old self, free from pain and shackles of illness.  She was happy.

            Is there any possibility what you heard was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           NO!

            Was there any possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience?   NONE

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?            No

Did you see the deceased?         No

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?      No

How long did the experience last?        Just a few seconds, although I could "feel" her presence for some time.  Then it became very clear that she was leaving to be with her other son who was currently driving down from San Francisco.  Sandy and I were VERY close in life.  I could often tell what was going on with her without contact and she could do the same with me.

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?         The beginning was sudden, the sense of her leaving was more gradual.

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?           Yes

She seemed happy to be free of the confines of her body.

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know?  no -- just a thank you

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?           Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:          I just KNOW it was real.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?   No

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:           Sandy had just died.  I felt sad and numb.  Grief had not really hit, and the sadness was minimal.  I was happy she was free of her pain.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?           No

I felt that this experience, although it happened to me, was more of a confirmation to her family that she was alright.  That it was okay for her to go, and even in death she knew that they would have a support system (not just me, but others too).

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      Best and worst = Sandy is gone.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         No

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?   No

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            I cried a lot.  The reality of how much I was going to miss her hit pretty hard.

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes

Most have rolled their eyes and placated me.  The family, for whom I believe the "message" was intended, all believe what I experienced was real.  That is all that matters to me.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?   No

 Is there anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?       no

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?            No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No 

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?           Yes, OBE's

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes

Please offer any suggestions you may have to improve this questionnaire.    no