My father died suddenly. When my mother rang to tell me I drove to my parents house with my baby daughter and stayed there a few days. As I drove down to my mother's I had this strange feeling that Dad was with another sister in her car. When I reached the house i had a feeling that dad was floating around at ceiling level laughing with joy. It was a feeling - I didn't see anything. My sister was there she said that when she was driving over she felt that dad was in her car. Everyone else was crying but I couldn't because I was paying too much attention to his presence. When I went to bed I spoke to him and said something like "I just wanted you to know that I know you are there, Dad" out loud to him. I went to identify him at the morgue because everyone else was too upset. The feelings continued all the time.  

The next day I drove home. In the car a presence came to me. Despite the fact that my hands were on the wheel I could feel the imprint of my father's hands in my hands a powerful energy came pouring through my body. It made me understand what was meant by the Holy Spirit. Holy is related to our word whole.  

The energy was incredibly blissful, it was life in its purest and incredibly invigorating, it was the most powerful combination of love, forgiveness, compassion and resolution. It was as though all things, everything - good and bad - were completely resolved within one energy that containe all. The being that my father had become reminded me of Jesus and those pictures of him that have rays coming out of his hands and I have always noted these rays in pictures and sculptures of holy people since. I understood what was meant by becoming one with Jesus as it felt like dad had become one with this being of light and love. I understood how angels could be the messengers between God and people. It was heaven, but there was no hell - it could not exist. 

It was the most powerful thing I have ever experienced. It was like in life we are really dead and in death there is real life. 

The experience lasted over an hour

Was this experience difficult to express in words? 

Yes

People think I am crazy and just don't understand if I try to explain it - I don't think it is something you really can explain perfectly - you have to experience it.

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?         

No

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?           

Yes

Dad held both my hands

            Was the touch familiar or unfamiliar?  

like nothing I had ever felt before

            Was anything communicated by the touch? 

I copy from above: Despite the fact that my hands were on the wheel I could feel the imprint of my father's hands in my hands a powerful energy came pouring through my body. It made me understand what was meant by the Holy Spirit. Holy is related to our word whole.  

The energy was incredibly blissful, it was life in its purest and incredibly invigorating, it was the most powerful combination of love, forgiveness, compassion and resolution. It was as though all things, everything - good and bad - were completely resolved within one energy that containe all. The being that my father had become reminded me of Jesus and those pictures of him that have rays coming out of his hands and I have always noted these rays in pictures and sculptures of holy people since. I understood what was meant by becoming one with Jesus as it felt like dad had become one with this being of light and love. I understood how angels could be the messengers between God and people. It was heaven, but there was no hell - it could not exist. 

It was the most powerful thing I have ever experienced. It was like in life we are really dead and in death there is real life.

            Is there any possibility what you felt was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience? 

no

Did you see the deceased?        

No

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?     

No

How long did the experience last?       

over an hour

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?        

I had been feeling this love and compassion for a few days but it was very muted and in the background compared to the experience in the car. The experience in the car came on very suddenly but eventually ebbed away slowly - I was still high from it for days

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?          

Yes

He was one with that energy

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know? 

Yes! apart from what was described above - he communicated to me that my sister would be the next person to get pregnant - as though he would be reborn in that baby.  

My answer to below about did I believe in ADC was maybe but I really didn't think about it. You really needed a maybe option below. so 13, 14,  maybe

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?          

Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:         

Well it was a real experience - now what it means is another question.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?  

No

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:          

Already have above

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?          

Yes

In the sense that it made it impossible to be sad about dad

What was the best and worst part of your experience?     

The best part - that I had it. The worst part - that I am not still having it.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?        

Uncertain                  Describe:           

it has modified some of my relgious ideas

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?   Yes     I can't explain. No matter how hard life is it is there in the background making me wonder.

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?            No       I think I already have!

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have you ever made such a compact?        Yes

AFter this experience I keep saying to my kids that I will try to come back to them. But I am not sure if that is a compact.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          Yes When a different sister announced she was pregnant I felt - no this is wrong - it is my other sister. Turned out that the sister who said she was pregnant was wrong and the sister that my father communicated that would get pregnant next did. She gave birth to a girl just over a year later.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Already have above

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?           No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Uncertain

I was experiencing another level of conciousness - I wasn't exactly watching my watch

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    Yes

Already have

Did you become aware of future events?       Yes

already described

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?         My meditation practice improved for a period of about seven years afterwards

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     No

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?            Uncertain

Only in the sense that Dad seemed to have become one with another being that was like some sort of container and communicator of the energy

Did you see a light?           No  But somehow - I felt it

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above?            No  I have already explained multiple locations

Have you shared this experience with others?        

Yes     Sometimes I meet someone who has had the same experience - they often say they don't tell people (sometimes I am the only one they have ever told) because they are afraid of being thought mad. I don't feel right with christians though. I feel like somehow the message of Jesus got manipulated by the christian religion. I cannot see how there could be a hell because heaven somehow includes hell but at the same time makes hell bliss. It is hard to explain - it is total forgiveness and compassion. But I feel as though the concept of heaven and hell being separate makes many christians energies like swiss cheese and they are just not right - like the concept of hell as a place of punishment kills compassion and forgiveness. Everyone else just think I am mad, but I still talk about it and say it is like an nde's and their are lots of books and documentaries on it to try to make it sound as scientific as something so unscientific can sound. And resign myself to being thought a loop. I don't know. Maybe it is just an interim stage and there is another experience beyond it. I can't say. But I believe it is the basic energy of the universe - no, correction - I know it is the basic energy of the universe. My grandfather used to right a lot of religious stuff - i really think from what he wrote he may have known. He belonged to a christian religion that didn't believe in hell. I never knew him and my father didn't follow his religion so he wasn't an influence in my life. I just had read a few things he said and thought he was nice but a bit loopy. He would say "Love Governs All" and about "Perfect Love" and stuff like that - came from Christian Science. I think they were onto something. But Buddhism has enough to explain and not contradict what I experienced.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?   No

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?            No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         Yes 

Meditation - Vipassana. A meditation that observes the sensations in the body with equanimity

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?           Yes 

No NDE or OBE but some precognition and some visions that really aren't the same thing

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes