Donna CL's ADC

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Experience description:  

After battling lung cancer for a number of years, my mother was admitted into a hospice. It was a beautiful place and we (including my mother) all felt really comfortable about her being there. We stayed a while as she got settled into the room. They explained to us that the hospice was a home away from home and that we were welcomed to come and stay the night whenever possible. We were happy with that and planned to visit a lot while she was in her last stages of the cancer. After talking, joking, etc... we decided to call it a night and said our goodbyes and see ya tomorrow's. That morning, around 5:00 am, we all received a phone call saying that my mother had become unresponsive and was not waking up. We (my sisters, brothers in laws, and I) went back to the hospice to sit with her. We called our minister and he was there with us too. The hospice explained the stages that she was going through and it was comforting to know that she was going easy. Anyway....we all said our goodbye's to her. We were told that she most likely could hear us, but just couldn't respond to us. So, we talked to her...let her know that it was okay to go and that we loved her and we'd be okay.

We were all remembering events in our lives with our mother and I just knew to look over at her at that instant....she took her last breath. I'll never forget that moment. It was peaceful, but so sad to me. I didn't want to let go of her hand. I wanted to stay there with her, but I had to leave her and let go. My mother had great faith and I know she's in a better place right now, but as I left...I felt sad because I didn't know if she had heard us for real...that we loved her and will always love her.

I went home. It was almost 1:00 am the next morning and she had been gone for only about an hour. My husband had not been able to be with me because he had just gone out of town for a couple of days on business. I went into my bedroom, got my bible that my mother had given me and got into bed. I had just turned the light off when I laid my head on the pillow and saw her face as clear as day. I felt both of her hands holding my face at the cheeks and she told me "I Love You". That was all she said and she was gone.

That small moment was such a comfort to me because she was unable to respond to us at the hospice. I didn't tell anyone about this for quite some time. I mentioned it to one of my sisters a few months later and she had told me of her similar experience except my mother was holding her hands. I was not asleep. I am 100% positive of it. I had just laid my head down on the pillow and closed my eyes. I was still crying. I believe it was my mother that visited me and gave me comfort before she moved on. Is this possible?

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?          Yes

            Describe what you heard, how clearly you heard it and what was communicated:   I heard the words as they came out of her mouth as clear as a bell.

            Did the voice or sound seem to originate externally or outside of you, inside you, or did you not hear a voice or sound, but had a sense of knowing what was communicated?  It seemed to come from outside. Like a normal speaking voice from someone talking to you.

            If you heard a voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar from the voice or sound the deceased made when they were alive?           It was her exact voice as when she was alive.

            Is there any possibility what you heard was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           No.

            Was there any possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience?   No.

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?            Yes

I was touched on my cheeks with her hands.

            Was the touch familiar or unfamiliar?   It was very soft and familiar.

            Was anything communicated by the touch?  Just care for me.

            Is there any possibility what you felt was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?  No. I was alone.

Did you see the deceased?         Yes

She looked peaceful and well. Much better than before. She had the same hair and a rosy complexion.

            How clearly did the deceased appear?            She seemed solid.

            How much of the deceased did you see?       I saw her face and hands.

            Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died?       She was her age at when she died.

            How healthy did the deceased appear to be?            She seemed healthy.

            Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           No.

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?      No

How long did the experience last?        A few moments.

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?         The beginning was sudden, but the end was gradual. Her face seemed to fade away from me and her hands slipped off my face.

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?           Yes, She seemed peaceful.

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know?  She just told me "I love you".

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?           Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:          I believe that my experience was definitely real because I saw, heard and felt the experience. I was not asleep and therefore it could not have been a dream. I do not take drugs.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?   No

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:           At first surprised, but it felt natural. I was not afraid. I was very comforted by it.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?           Yes

Yes. I felt at ease about her passing. I knew that she wasn't sick anymore and got a sense of happiness from her.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      The best part was seeing her. The worst part was when she left again, but I felt more at ease about her passing.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         Yes

            Describe:      It's given me a deeper and richer faith in God.

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?            Yes

I have a feeling that she is with God now. That she was happy to go and that she was allowed to visit me before she left.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            I was comforted and felt at ease.

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?           No

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    Yes, I felt like I had the truth. That there was life after death and we shouldn't fear it. That my faith in God is not in vain.

Did you become aware of future events?       No

Did you see a light?           Yes, There was a kind of aura around her face.

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes

After almost a year, I shared it with my husband and children. It was a very personal event and I didn't want them to dismiss it as bogus. After thinking about it very often, I decided to share it with them. I had shared it with my other sisters and found out that one of my sisters had a similar experience on the same night.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?            Uncertain, I has asked for an opinion about it, but not sure if it was this site.

Is there anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?       I just feel lucky and honored that I was able to have this experience. I will cherish it forever.

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes

Please offer any suggestions you may have to improve this questionnaire.    No comments other than to say thank you for letting me share my experience with you. I'm hopeful that you may provide insight to what my experience was all about.