A few days after the funeral, my father came to me in a dream. He was wet, pale and had a cut on his head. My sisters, mother and I were all sitting around in our living room. My father was standing before us and talking. I only remember what he said to me. He said that I am the man of the family now and everything is going to be okay and I should not be afraid. My sisters had the same dream, I don't recall my mother talking about it. She was very private about that stuff and never showed us kids her pain. She was very strong.

My father never entered my dreams again until Years later, maybe 1980, I was in boarding school and I had a dream that I was at a sporting event in a modern coliseum. People were coming up to me (dream people, I call them. I don't know them, but seem to know them in my dreams) they were saying excitedly, "Your father is here!!" They pointed across the arena and I could see a single beam of light shinning down on one spectator. It was my father in the chair in the stands, off by himself. He was watching the game. I pushed through the crowd franticly. I just wanted to ask him so many questions...but when I finally arrived at the place he was sitting, he was gone. I was left with a feeling of assurance that I was not alone.

1977- We were visiting my Grandmother in Greenville, SC. My mother had a fianc' Dr Bill. He had a small airplane (two seater). My mother and him flew to my grandmother's, while my oldest sister drove the car. When it was time to go home I wanted to fly back in the plane. My mother said no, she was flying back. I was angry and refused to see them off at the airfield. My sisters drove my mother and Dr. Bill to the airfield. As my sisters waived goodbye the small plane took off down the short airfield, he climbed steep, but suddenly stalled, the plane flipped upside down and crashed at a very steep angle beyond the trees at the end of the airfield. My sisters watched this in horror.

I was brought to a house near the airfield by a family friend who said my mother was okay. When I got there and saw my sisters in such a hysterical state, I knew it was bad. I went into shock, they had to lay me down on a bed.

A few days after the funeral, my other came to me in a dream. She was covered in fresh scars and was very pale. Dr. Bill (her fianc and the pilot) was also there but he sat quietly smoking his pipe, like he always did. My mother said everything was okay and I should not be afraid. Again I was left with a feeling of assurance that I am not alone. My sisters also had the same dream. I have not dreamed of my mother since.

I recently got sober. I was at a point in my life where I felt suicide could be the only relief. Through a series of strange events I have found myself in a very active men's AA group in Beverly Hills. I just spent a weekend with Monks at the San Lorenzo Seminary. It was a men's AA retreat. I had a profound spiritual experience. I was truly seeking and talking with other men who had found a spiritual path. Later in the night I took a hot shower. In the shower i closed my eyes and suddenly saw a mass of brilliant stars. I could see the shower walls and the earth below me became transparent, I could see stars all around my, I suddenly was over come with a feeling of love and acceptance. That was last weekend. Since that I have felt someone is with me. My power went out last night I had nothing to do I found a battery radio, flipped thought the am stations ( I live in Topanga canyon and can't get fm) there was the show with your interview about near death experiences. I know those higher beings you spoke of, I think they are with me now. Just 2 years ago I was putting the muzzle of my M1 garrand (which I have since sold) in my mouth, just checking if I could reach the trigger. Now I have a complete feeling of peace and the fear of death and financial insecurity and many other fears have been taken from me.

     Thank you for your work.   

Was this experience difficult to express in words?  No

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?          Yes

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?           Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:          I was shown that matter is transparent in the world they exist, I saw a glimmer of the universe with different eyes.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?   Yes

it was a glimmer...the encounters with my dead parents was more like a dream, I knew it was a dream in the dream.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?           Yes

my glimmer of the universe experience healed my sense of worthlessness and low self esteem

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      I am so glad to know these beings, i have been away for so long drinking, the worst is realizing it was always there for me.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         Yes

            Describe:      people say I seem very calm and have a glow

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?   Yes

I know now I can accomplish great things and help others to see the light.

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?            Yes

I know now what i have always suspected. we ARE here to learn and to help others. it boils down to community. we must use our talents to help others, spread the love, be of service. we can feed the hungry and cure the sick. we will eventually. maybe many worlds from now

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            calm, peace, love

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Yes

My shower experience, the earth and walls of the building became transparent, yet I could still see an outline, or reflection. I was there suspended with millions of stars around me. It seemed like an eternity yet only in an instance, in other words I felt as though for that brief moment there was no time, at least time as I perceive it. It was very bizarre.

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    Yes

I learned that matter is transparent when seen with these eyes or from this world. Matter is mostly space anyway. I learned that space travel becomes possible, there is structure and design in that world, but beyond our understanding. All life is connected, I also learned that there is so much i do not know, and it's okay, I'm not supposed to know everything, more will be revealed.

Did you become aware of future events?       No

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?         Uncertain

I have always been very intuitive, now I feel it is a gift i can develop.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Uncertain

I looked down, but in my mind's eye, there was no floor, only millions of stars. It was amazing.

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?       No

Did you see a light?           Yes

maybe there was light behind my parents...I'm not sure if I put that there or not.

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above?            No

Have you shared this experience with others?        

Yes

Yes with everyone I feel is open to it, others who aren't I share just enough so they may understand without being intimidated.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?   No

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?            No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No 

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes