I was lying in bed,
relaxed, but fully alert, not even drowsy. Suddenly, a being entered my room
from the window-side to my right. I can only describe it like an
electricity/energy sense of this presence. There was a definite, for-sure
knowing that this was a person/being/angel.
My first thought was,
"I should be scared. There is someone in my room." But I immediately realized
that I was not scared at all. What I felt was as if I was being
touched/enveloped by warmth, a glowing light, and a gentle, deep love.
I wondered if this were
an angel, or if this was Jesus. Only later did I think about that this had
happened not long after my grandmother's death and might have been her.
There were no words
spoken, nothing that I saw with my eyes, but I knew this being was real. If
there had been words, they might have been
1. There is more to
this world than you know of from the science and materialism you've been exposed
2, Love is what this
whole existence is all about.
3, Love is not an
impersonal force. Love is always person-to-person.
experience difficult to express in words?
Yes It was a clear,
absolutely vivid experience, but without describable visual component or any
Did you ONLY sense an awareness of presence of the deceased without actually
seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling them?
Did you hear the
deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?
Did you feel a
touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?
Describe where and how you were touched:
above. Not a physical touch, more like the touch of energy/electricity.
Was the touch
familiar or unfamiliar?
Familiar -- like when
you can sort of sense someone is in the room with you without actually seeing
them, but this was much more so, more vivid, more sure.
communicated by the touch?
See above: Love
Is there any
possibility what you felt was from any other source present in the surroundings
at the time of your experience?
The worst was that I did not share it with anyone, not believing that anyone
would believe me, and that I did not have an intellectually affirmed faith in
God at the time that allowed me to consciously and fully absorb this beautiful
encounter into my earthly life -- This took many years.
Did you see the deceased?
Did you smell a
distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?
Could you sense the
emotions or mood of the deceased?
I would not call
this an emotion or mood. I can only say that this being was loving and filled
with the joy of love.
Did the deceased
give you information you did not previously know?
No earthly information.
Only a "statement" of the reality of the spiritual world, spiritual beings.
How do you
currently view the reality of your experience?
was definitely real
explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:
I was alert, awake, sane. Can't prove it any more than I can prove that I am
sitting here looking at my computer.
experience dream like in any way?
Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?
I believe because I
was steeped in an environment (college and grad school) of scientific
materialism for several years after this experience, that I did not integrate
the experience into my worldview or let the emotional comfort and healing it
brought really permeate my being. But all the while, it was lying dormant and I
feel was a part of bringing me to a deep faith in God at age 25, and which has
continued to grow and develop through out my life up until this point.
What was the best and worst part of your experience?
The best was the
experience itself, that it happened.
Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?
believe it laid the foundation of making me a woman of deep faith in God, of
making me a Christian (with the Christian theology of God as personal), and
finally of making me a charismatic (seeing and exercising spiritual gifts in the
you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?
Yes Yes, but it seems that it was delayed because only later could I
integrate this with a cognitive understanding/belief in God. (Happened when I
was 22, re-discovered my belief in God at age 25)
the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death,
afterlife, God, etc.?
Yes After 3-4 years. (See question #25)
you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience
that could be verified later?
the experience witnessed or experienced by others?
you have any sense of altered space or time?
Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or
Love is the center of all of existence, and this Love is utterly personal.
you become aware of future events?
you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience
that you did not have prior to the experience?
not sure if this began then, but I do have a deep empathic feeling for people's
emotional suffering. Sometimes, if someone is recounting a hard/sad experience
to me, even if they are smiling as they talk, tears will pour down my cheeks, I
sense the person's deep sorrow/anguish. When this happens, I am not sad myself,
more as if the Spirit within me is weeping with this person.
you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?
you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?
still do not know if the being who encountered me was my recently deceased
grandmother or an angelic being.
you see a light?
with my outer eyes, but sensed/seen by the inner eyes of my spirit.
any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location
Have you shared this experience with others?
Several years after we were married, I told my husband. I recently shared the
experience with my two grown daughter and a close friend.
Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher
or web site?
there anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?
years after this experience, I went to graduate school in Christian education
where I came to love studying Theology. I now realize that some of the profound
insights I had into Christology and Trinitarian understanding (had a professor
who was awed by this) had come to me not by my own reasoning or "smarts", but
rather through the divine revelation given to me by God when that Being of Love
entered my room when I was age 22.
Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life,
medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?
which I will explain in another questionnaire like this one when I have time, on
this website. Several others which have affirmed, expanded, but not reproduced
you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or
other spiritual event?
the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively
describe your experience?