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Francesca S ADC

Experience description:  

My husband died on the 6th of July 1996, I never accepted his sudden death. He was killed in Germany on the �Autobahn� in a car crash, in which he was innocent; the other guy came out of it without a scratch. Anyway� 

After his death I kept hearing, smelling and seeing him (seeing him, was only in my dreams, but were they really just �dreams�?). 

The most important contact that I have experienced was the first Christmas without him, actually it was New Year�s Eve. 

All my friends would call me and invite me and the boys over to party, so I wouldn�t be alone, but I didn�t want to, they kept calling one after the other, at the end I unplugged the phone. I wanted to be alone and make an end to my misery; I was looking for heavy medications, strong enough that my boys and myself could join their father in heaven. They were already asleep and I was thinking, that I have to take them with me, because they couldn�t survive my going anyway, so I wanted to end their misery, too. But somehow I got so tired in my searching (I mean really tired, I barely could keep my eyes open, as if I would have already taken some sleeping pills), but I didn�t have enough in the house, so somehow I went to sleep. 

I woke up by the sound of the popping of a champagne bottle and the voice of my husband, telling me to get up and not to sleep through the New Year. He poured champagne in glasses and kept telling me to wake up and get up, he wanted to celebrate. I actually answered him, I told him to let me sleep, I was too tired to celebrate and anyway with all this noise he would wake up the boys. And he said I have to wake them up anyway to see the fireworks, he kept talking and talking to get up and drink with him in celebration of the New Year, he stood in the doorway of my bedroom calling me lazybones. Finally tired of listening to him nagging at me, I got up. What a surprise, he wasn�t there and I realized he could not have been there, because he passed away 5 months earlier, but it was so real; I got up just in time to wake up the boys and see the fireworks with them. 

As I said I had many more, but this one stayed really with me. 



Was this experience difficult to express in words?  No

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?          Yes

            Describe what you heard, how clearly you heard it and what was communicated:    As I described in the above story, I heard him, saw him, talked to him, I truly thought he was there.

And that all before I read any books about ADC...but I knew he WAS there!

            Did the voice or sound seem to originate externally or outside of you, inside you, or did you not hear a voice or sound, but had a sense of knowing what was communicated?  It was outside of me, it came from the door, where he was standing, I even turned to him

            If you heard a voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar from the voice or sound the deceased made when they were alive?           Exactly the same voice as when he was alive, exactly the same!

            Is there any possibility what you heard was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           No, absolutely not...!

            Was there any possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience?   No...

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?            No

Did you see the deceased?         Yes

He was dressed in his favorite jeans and t-shirt, as usual really!

            How clearly did the deceased appear?            Very solid, and very annoying trying to get me up, even though I wanted to sleep

            How much of the deceased did you see?       He was standing in the door, I saw him from head to toe!

            Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died?       Yep, same age...

            How healthy did the deceased appear to be?            Really healthy, no cuts or bruises from the accident, as if it never happened... the crash I mean!

            Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           Not a chance.

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?      Yes

            What smell, scent, fragrance or odor did you smell?           Well yes, he had on his usual cologne: Armani

            Was the smell, scent, fragrance or odor familiar?     Yes, his usual cologne after shaving...

            Was anything communicated by the smell?   Not really, only that he was there.

            Is there any possibility that the smell, scent, fragrance or odor was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?        No...

How long did the experience last?        I don't know really, it seems forever... the arguing back and forth:

Wake up

No, I don't want to

Wake up, you need to wake up the boys for the fire works....

And so on...

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?         I don't know... He appeared in the door, we argued, I gave up and got out of bed, and he was gone!

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?           Yes

He was eager for me and the boys to see the New Year's fire works...

He was exited, he wanted to celebrate.

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know?  No, nothing. Even though we all wanted to know how the accident happened.

But then, when I was talking to him, I didn't realize he had the accident five months prior.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?           Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:           I could feel him, I know he was there, and he validated by coming back several times after that, and giving me advice in stuff that was happening in my life.            

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:           During the experience I didn't have any emotions, because I was believing I was talking to my husband as usual.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?           Uncertain

I thought I could contact him any time I wanted, but I don't think there was healing, not at that point.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      The best part was of course: HE WAS THERE 

The worst part? well, he left...

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         Yes                 Describe:      I thank God every day for my blessings.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?
   Yes     Attitude, change of attitude, I was more open on welcoming anybody in my family that passed on.

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?            Yes     I know that our soul lives forever, that we can communicate with our loved ones, some of us are better at this.

That there is no death, really, only the body decomposes.

And that we are creatures of God.

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have you ever made such a compact?        No

Never thought about this before.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          Yes James Van Praagh told me that he visited a lot.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Wow.... he was here, oh my God, he came to me...

I was exited, happy that he came, and sad that he was physically gone!

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?           No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   No

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    No

Did you become aware of future events?       Yes

Every time I would feel him, I would make sure to greet him and tell him I love you.

I just knew!

Have you shared this experience with others?        

Yes     I don't know if the people were influenced, but I know they believed me.

They didn't think I was a nut case.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?            Yes

I posted on the James Van Praagh website.

And I sent it to Bill Guggenheim.

 Is there anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?       It was way to short, I wish it would have lasted forever.

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?            No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No 

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?           Yes 

Out of body experience, maybe...

I saw my husband in spirit, my parents, my 2 sets of grandparents, my 2 uncles, my sister in-law, and one aunt sitting all together at a round table playing cards, laughing and talking to each other (which was odd, because down here they all soke different languages).

When they saw me, my dad and my husband pushed me outside, telling me I wasn't supposed to be there, and then I fell from my bed!

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes

Please offer any suggestions you may have to improve this questionnaire.    Maybe to let people explain their "NOs" as well...