Jackie B's ADCs

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Experience description:

I was very close to my Grandma.  She died at 5:30 p.m. in July of '82.  I was wearing the watch she gave me as a graduation gift that day and when she died it quit working, exactly at the time of her death.  I thought about having a jeweler look at it but I was reluctant to part with it.  Often when I thought of her I would get out the watch and hold it.  At some point at least a year or so after her death, I got out the watch and noticed it had started working! 

About 10 years after my Grandma's death, I was admiring my step-mother-in-law's jewelry and commented that I wish I had an amethyst ring.  That night as I lay in bed, my Grandma visited me.  It was like I was floating over my Grandma's living room and I could see her sitting in a chair, holding me in her lap and I appeared to be about 10 years old.  She was telling me about a ring she wanted me to have when I was older.  She told me the ring belonged to my Grandpa's Mom.  When I was old enough, she wanted me to have that ring.  After I witnessed this scene, I heard her voice telling me I was old enough now and to ask my Grandpa for it.

I called my aunt the next day who verified that she knew of the ring and she remembered Grandma did want me to have it.  My Grandpa found it and has since given it to me.  I only wear the ring on special occasions as the ring band is somewhat soft and I don't want anything to happen to it.  I have had no other visits from her since that night.

My second after death communication was just a couple days after my sister Roni died July 13, 2001.  During the last month of her life she listened to ocean waves with seagulls squawking in the background from a battery operated sound machine.  During her final hours I stroked her hair and encouraged her to relax and listen to the waves and the birds.  After her funeral, as I was writing an e-mail to an Internet support group I was a member of telling them of her funeral, a warm, comforting feeling came over me and I realized I could hear throughout my house the sound of ocean waves rolling in and occasionally a bird.  I have no idea where the sound was coming from because I did not have the sound machine.  The sound continued even as I stopped typing and searched my house looking for the source.  I believe my sister was with me, letting me know she was okay. 

My next communication with my sister was in early March, 2002.  I was feeling a guilty about not being able to spend as much time with Roni's three children as I wanted to.  When I went to bed one evening I was watching "Crossing Over with John Edward" and someone had said they just asked for a sign.  So that night I said out loud that I wanted a sign.  At a little after 4:00 a.m. I woke up to the sound of an echoing plastic Coke bottle being bounced off the palm of someone's hand.  It didn't startle me because in my mind I could actually see my sister standing beside my bed bouncing the pop bottle off her hand.  Then she was gone.  I laid there for a minute trying to figure out what it could have meant. 

I found the whole experience really comforting although that was probably her way of lecturing me and telling me to get with it, spend more time with her kids.  I couldn't get back to sleep so I got up and went to the restroom.  I turned on my radio.  The song playing was Brooks & Dunn singing "My Maria I love you so, oh my Maria".  That just reaffirmed my feeling that Roni was there with me.  On "Crossing Over" John Edward has said many times that when he refers to someone's second or middle name it is because another family member has the same name.  My sister's name is Roni Marie.  My dad's name is Ron.  I really don't know whether the song was a coincidence or a message from the other side.  Although I couldn't see her when I was in the bathroom listening to the radio, I could feel her presence.  When that song ended, the next song that came on was Martina McBride singing about how she felt she had been blessed with children and family.  My sister was a 36 year old mother of three young children when she died.

My most recent visit from my sister happened on June 11, 2002.  I had two visits from Roni in one day.  My father was diagnosed with a brain tumor just a few days prior to that day.  On June 11 we were to meet with my dad's doctor.  My whole family was really scared because my Dad's symptoms had seemed to escalate over a short time.  When I got to work and turned off my car I could hear music playing in my trunk.  I had a portable radio inside a collapsible lawn chair that I had not listened to in at least 3 weeks.  It was playing loud enough for me to hear it immediately.  I opened my trunk and dumped the bag containing the lawn chair and radio.  I had to turn the dial quite a ways down and then click it off.  I wondered how it had come on by itself.  I didn't really pay attention to the song that was playing until I started walking away from my car.  It was a song I had heard before but I didn't know the name.  The song would not leave my mind.  It drove me crazy all morning.  I kept hearing over and over in my head "You gotta be tough, You gotta be stronger, You gotta be calm, You gotta stay together, but no one at work knew the song.

At lunch time I needed to run an errand.  I looked at the portable radio to see what station it was on.  I put my car radio on that same station and hoped the song would be replayed on my way to the store.  It didn't.  When I was getting out I said out loud "Well Roni, if you are trying to tell me something, you are going to have to play it again on my way back."  I was in the store about 10 minutes when a warm feeling came over me and I realized the song was playing on their overhead radio.  I asked if anyone knew who was singing the song and someone told me "You Gotta Be" by Des'ree.  When I got back to work I searched the Internet and came up with the song Roni played for me twice.  This is the part that it seemed to be saying both times I realized her presence: 

  You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold
  You gotta be wiser, you gotta be hard
  You gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
  You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm
  You gotta stay together
  All I know, all I know, love will save the day

We went to the doctor later that day and found out that although my Dad has a brain tumor, it is not believed to be life threatening and not the cause of his current symptoms.  They are continuing to run tests on him to find out what is wrong with him. 

I don't question whether this was all coincidence.  I actually felt Roni's presence in the store when I realized the song was playing again.  I didn't really feel her presence that morning when the radio was playing in my trunk but my immediate thought was that it was her.  I had told her over and over prior to her death that I believed after death communication was possible and that I would be open to her if she was able to communicate.  I'm waiting for her next visit.


Have these experiences changed how you feel about death or have they changed how you view life on earth?  Any changes in your relationships, career, etc? 

I would say that my experiences have changed how I feel about life after death.  But, even though I believe the soul lives on, it does not replace the presence of the person and the love given to those left behind.  My sister was a young mother of 3 very young children.  Her 7 year old wakes almost every night sobbing, wanting her mother.  I believe my sister is aware of her childrens' achievements but the reality is they are too young to understand a possible visit from her and crave the physical loving hugs and warmth of a living mother.  Even me believing that after my own death I will be able to watch over my loved ones doesn't make me any less frightened of dying.