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Kristin B's ADC

Experience description:  

My mom passed away on April 18, 2012. She was my best friend. She always had health problems, even being clinically dead at least 3 times, but she always fought on. She got very ill on April 15th, was rushed to the hospital, put into ICU and was pulled off all artificial means keeping her alive. We spent the 17th in the hospital with her, talking and holding her hand, but left late that afternoon. On the 18th, my husband and I got to the hospital, I kissed my mom on the forehead and went and held her hand. Not even 15 minutes later, she stopped breathing. I felt that she knew I was coming and waited for me- we always had a strong bond, stronger than a normal mother-daughter bond. I was devastated when she passed.

About a week after she passed, I was talking to her and asked her if she could, to give me a sign- that she was okay, that she could hear me, that she knew I loved her and missed her. About 3 days after I asked that, I was at work. I was outside at lunch standing next to my car having a cigarette. All of a sudden I saw something flying near me, and moved away because I thought it was a bug. Right after I moved it came back- it was a beautiful black and orange butterfly. It then landed on me. I have been to many places with butterflies all around, where they land on everyone else, and have never in my life have one land on me, so that was special in and of itself. Immediately upon the butterfly landing on me, a thought came into my head that I haven't thought of in such a long time- my mother used to tell me and write on my cards- "Be a butterfly- be free". I instantly knew that this was the sign that I had asked for- my mom was telling me that now she was free, and she would always be with me. I started laughing and crying at the same time, the emotions overwhelmed me. But I couldn't stop smiling, there was just a sense of peace, and maybe relief, that I felt.

When I left work that day, I saw the butterfly again as I got in my car. I was on my way to visit my dad, who lives about 20 miles away. When I got to the house that he & my mother had lived in for over 20 years, I walked into the backyard- right in the middle of the garage was a butterfly, that looked exactly the same as the one I had seen earlier. The next day, my husband was leaving work at around 11:15 at night. When he walked out, sitting right on the hood of his car, was the same type of butterfly. He had never seen one at night like that before. The next day at work, I saw the butterfly again. Then, when I got home, I talked to my brother. He couldn't believe the coincidence of it all, and the fact that butterflies had special significance between my mother and I (even though it was something we hadn't talked about in years), and said he was sure it was our mother. That was surprising because he does not believe in signs, or anything like that.

Immediately after hanging up with him, I went on my computer. Reading through my Facebook news feed, I came across a post that someone had written earlier that day. She said that she had always been afraid of butterflies, but that she had seen them all day and wondered what the significance was, and if it was a sign. One of her friends then posted a response regarding after death communication from loved ones who had passed on, and that butterflies were a common occurrence. I felt like that was meant for me to read, my confirmation that this truly was a message from my mom and not simply me seeing a butterfly and reading into it what I wanted. Apparently my brother told our father about what I had been talking about, and my father called me to tell me that he had been out playing golf on May 1st (the same day I saw the butterfly at work the first time) and had something similar happen- he had seen a couple butterflies that day and one of them came and landed on him as well. I feel that my mom was letting my dad and I know that she still loves us, and will always be with us.

Was this experience difficult to express in words?  Uncertain

I have expressed it to certain people who fully understand it for what it is, however I know that a lot of people would just think that it was a normal event that I was reading into.

Did you ONLY sense an awareness of presence of the deceased without actually seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling them?          Yes

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?          No

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?            Uncertain

the butterfly landed on me, and I truly believe it was my mom, but I can't say that I actually felt her touch me

Did you see the deceased?         No

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?      No

How long did the experience last?        Just a few minutes, however as stated in my experience, have had similar instances of seeing butterflies, or hearing about them since the 4 days since the incident

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?         sudden- all of a sudden, the butterfly appeared.

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?           No

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know?  No

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?           Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:           I know in my heart that my mom was sending me a sign, that she was watching over me, that she was listening to me and that she'd always be there.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?   No

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:           Before it happened, I was sad. I was thinking about my mom and how much I missed her. Once I saw the butterfly, I immediately felt happy and peaceful.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?           Uncertain

I am still sad over the loss, but I now feel more at peace knowing she's out there, and no longer in pain.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      The best part was feeling her presence, and knowing that she's okay.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         Uncertain                  Describe:            I feel a stronger faith since that incident, but I don't know that I would say my life has changed.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?
   Yes     A stronger faith, and a stronger understanding of life after death

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?            Yes     I know that life and the love shared between people continues on eternally. I know that one day, we'll all be together again as a family.

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have you ever made such a compact?        Uncertain

My mom had always said that she'd let us know she's still watching us after she passed, but we never made a "compact" specifically

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Happiness, peacefulness

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?           No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   No

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    No

Did you become aware of future events?       No

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?         No

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     No

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?            No

Did you see a light?           No

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above?            No

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes     My brother, who has always been skeptical, thought it was amazing, and actually agreed that it was a sign from my mom. My father experienced something similar on the same day, and also believes that it was from my mom.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?            Yes

I mentioned it on another site regarding ADC's, but do not know the name of that site.

 Is there anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?       I think that even though butterflies are all around, and people can say what they want, that my mom knew that I would understand this sign. She knew that I would remember her words to me.

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?            No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No 

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?           No 

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes

I believe that i was able to explain how I felt about the experience, I just wish I could explain the bond that my mom and I had in life.