For a long time prior I felt time was slipping away from us.

Like a clock strapped to my back. I feared a tornado or something happening to him. But could not put my finger on why I felt this.  

At experience , I thought I was dreaming of a beautiful white slope and a fence and a church. Kind of like my street. Yet I did not know it. Then I was awoken to loud voices. Close in my ear like a crowded elevator. But not recognizing the words . They were male voices. Then I was fully awaken. ON my bed Bob, my ex husbands face appeared big like a projection. I felt like I was kneeling on my bed and looking at my wall or something . Like I was startled out of my sleep. I knew I woken and knew my surroundings and things around my room. I was shocked to see him. He was smiling a young boyish grin when I knew him at 23. Except with deeper chin lines. He was so proud he broke through! His eyes gleamed of open skies and knowledge and love. All of a sudden I was telling him how much I missed him and when I tried to contact me. He told me telepathically he knew every attempt I had made, all in his eyes came a message. That I just simply understood. We were not talking by our mouths. He quieted me. Said he loved me and forgave me for not forgiving him and his many attempts to contact me in the earlier years after the separation when we were young. It took a split second for these messages to be relayed. He then said I have something to show you laughing and strongly with loving eyes guiding me to be quiet. As if there was not much time for him. I felt us rushed.  A loud bell was clanging in my ears bothering me but beckoning him to come, it seemed in the background. He then sent me  the most unusual but wonderful shock full of electricity sending his love. It electrified me from head to toes. I was stunned laying on my back then somehow. Like an electric current straight thru my core. Good, pure just golden sunshine. Then he laughed and did it again.

I knew instantly this was his love and then gods. I was paralyzed like in ecstasy but also knowing the secret of the universe. It was unexplainable yet I knew everything. (When we were married we debated religion. I was catholic he was an atheist. He used to tease me, because he liked his cigarettes and beer but he had a wonderful great sense of humor he knew I loved. He used to say ld say, Well I am gonna die first, so I will find you and let you know what's on the other side if I was right!" He was never at my home where I am so he found me. The shock he sent was once for love for me but somehow driven by another I felt it as the second. Just to prove his point without a doubt. As if I could doubt it. It was the most wonderful experience of my life.   

After the shock I became aware of my big huge ear to ear smile on my face. And I said out loud to myself . Bob where the heck are you? I did not know he passed away 3 years before! I found out by a Google afterwards that opened to his obituary and I reached his family to confirm. He had cancer, a bum hip and in a lot of pain with a cane. He was sad for his home life feeling very lonely. Unfortunately we never made it but I know he talked about me to his parents so I know he missed me.  

Afterwards for an entire year I cried and grieved for our loss very heavily. I also wished I should have been there to help him. I cried often. Lights went out often sometimes tripled at work in the hall. Nothing was wrong with the bulb. I think it was him staying near me when I needed it. I was overburdened because I was also having other family problems. But I knew he sent me a message of his love that he was okay and I will be okay too. It is still very clear in my head that shock and his incredible sky eyes. So now, I think God told him he has more to do. I feel his presence or wish for him. But I think he was only allowed 1 time to contact me. He had a beautiful sole so I think God has more for him to do in heaven.   

For the skeptics. I would not dream him in another place. I did not know he passed away. 

PS The next year I found out a friend also had an near death experience (NDE) having a heart attack. But we shared the same shock but touching a river along on his walk in the woods as if when he was a child with a friend . He did not know my ex-husband it was at different times. He was dead for 45 seconds.     

Was this experience difficult to express in words?            Yes

The electric shocks. Like golden sunshine absorbing all my skin and understanding the universe with more love then I ever imagined.

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?          Yes

            Describe what you heard, how clearly you heard it and what was communicated:    Bells and his thoughts.

            Did the voice or sound seem to originate externally or outside of you, inside you, or did you not hear a voice or sound, but had a sense of knowing what was communicated?  Loud enough to be external. But it was a projection like and telepathic. I knew immediately and understood. I only heard the other voices in the beginning.

            If you heard a voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar from the voice or sound the deceased made when they were alive?           I did not hear his voice since he spoke to me telepathically. I heard male voices mumbling . I got the feeling he was with close friends. Somehow probably his best friend Scott. Who I found out overdosed years before his death his parents said.

            Is there any possibility what you heard was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           The electric shock the 2nd time was from a superior being thru him.

            Was there any possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience?   No.

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?            Yes

Electric Shock. Telepathically.

            Was the touch familiar or unfamiliar?   Very unfamiliar. But very welcome.

            Was anything communicated by the touch?  Love and knowledge of a more eternal heaven.

            Is there any possibility what you felt was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?  Yes him and feeling of superior being.

Did you see the deceased?         Yes

Projection image. Twinkling eyes opened up to a beautiful sky showing his sole.

I had not seen him in a long time. Same face chin with deeper lines.

            How clearly did the deceased appear?            Like a projection movie somewhat transparent on a screen

            How much of the deceased did you see?       Only his face

            Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died?       He seemed older . I last saw him at age 23. He had deeper chin lines.

His dad said he was skinny from the cancer he did at age 43.

            How healthy did the deceased appear to be?            Deep chin lines from age or could be weight loss due to cancer

            Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           No other source present except in his shock a superior feeling from heaven.

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?      No

How long did the experience last?        Not long enough my guess would be a minute total

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?         gradual then sudden, gradual then sudden again

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?           Yes

Very proud he reached me and very happy.

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know?  I did not know he passed away 3 years before.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?           Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:           I had no idea he passed away to dream of it.

I still remember the shock vividly. Not like a dream.

My friend had an NDE who had a shock.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?   No

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:           Excitement, Love, Amazement, Shock, Knowledge

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?      

My husband helped the grieving process. I felt responsible for his suicide.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      Grieving for a love I shall never have again.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         N0 comment                        Describe:      I forgave my family for an inheritance issue because I could not forgive him.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?   Yes     I truly believe in life after death and a higher being who shares a golden goodness of love.

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?            Yes     Knowledge there is life and love after death.

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have you ever made such a compact?        Yes

Yes. He told me he would tell me if he died first. 25 years before.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          Yes Friend had NDE afterwards. Did not know before.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Love, Excitement, Knowledge

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?           No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Yes

It seemed about a minute or a few seconds with many flashes, who knows how long.

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    Yes

Cant explain it . But I remember feeling of greatness of knowledge. Kind of a " Oh that's how !!!!!!!

Did you become aware of future events?       No

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?         Yes

Lights flicker and a door opened and my dogs sniff the air and growl when home alone. I say to them its ok I know its bob and they settle down.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Yes

I felt I was kneeling or sitting up but I don't remember doing it. Or lying down at the shock.

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?    Yes

I heard his friends voices first

Did you see a light?           Yes

To me it looked like white snow.

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above?            Yes

Lights flickered at work often while grieving.

But at the older job when he died and I was unaware of it. I remembered later.

I was talking to a friend about someone else and his face forced into my brain. And I said to her where did that come from because it was not linked to my thoughts.  It seemed like someone shoved a photo in my face all of a sudden.

Have you shared this experience with others?        

Yes     They did not really know what to say. Some say they believed.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?   No

 Is there anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?       If you have a feeling of something go by your instinct. Don't ignore it.

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?            No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No 

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?           Uncertain 

I dreamed I flew over buildings as a young child and could not find my body. I did not know what it was or understood it. After my experience I read about OBEs.  When I was 13, I attended a twig religious meeting . They spoke in tongues. I thought I did and then now I think it was all my imagination .