Raney S's ADC
I was struggling with believing in anything, any idea of God, just left me empty. My godmother, Eileen, in the Catholic faith, which I was raised in, died. The morning she died from a cardiac arrest, (I am pretty sure it was an M.I.), I had the experience of being aware of my surroundings, my clock and the early morning time...I think sometime before 0600am. I felt like I had died, no pain, no nothing, just a consciousness that I had died. It was not like a dream but a more powerful feeling, I thought I died, but it was wonderful, uplifting and the sense of peace was overpowering. Then my alarm went off. I went off with the alarm. I shared that feeling and I literally said, "I died" to my ex husband. I went on and on all day and felt like I had died, there was a God and the feeling was utter and complete peace. At that point and to this day, I remember somewhat the feeling, however, now, I just remember that I had that overpowering peaceful feeling. I new there was a God from it, and it was wonderful to be dead, I knew we went on from that. However, I never saw anyone. I just had the correlated feeling with the time of death with my godmother. It was not until the next day my mother told me that Eileen had died. It freaked me out, because she had really hurt me, rejected me and isolated me in my lifetime. I did not think she cared much about me, but I certainly cannot deny this experience!
Was this experience difficult to express in words? Yes
How do you explain, to anyone, you looked at your clock and proceeded to feel as if you had died, I think I felt lifted up...but utter complete peace and then my alarm went off. I was back to reality, as we all know it. I was conscious cause I looked at my clock. Now, I do not remember the time, but it was before I would have normally gotten up.
Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?
Describe what you heard, how clearly you heard it and what was communicated: I heard nothing
Did the voice or sound seem to originate externally or outside of you, inside you, or did you not hear a voice or sound, but had a sense of knowing what was communicated? n/a
If you heard a voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar from the voice or sound the deceased made when they were alive? n/a
Is there any possibility what you heard was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience? n/a
Was there any possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience? n/a
Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased? Uncertain
That is my other experience. The night my mother had a CVA, almost died and is now dying (on hospice)--May 2007, I felt someone, distinctly put a warm hand on my shoulder, (right to be exact). I was alone at work, actually right where I am now, when I felt this.
Was the touch familiar or unfamiliar? Not familiar but safe, I was not frightened.
Was anything communicated by the touch? I did not think so at first, but the next day, it let me know that she was aware of me, and has helped me through her illness. I spoke to her about this, she looked surprised. I have no idea if it was her or another member of the family, but it was someone comforting me!
Is there any possibility what you felt was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience? no, I was alone, in the nurses station, and this was felt firmly on my shoulder. I noted it to my family before I knew about the CVA
Did you see the deceased? No
Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased? No
How long did the experience last? just long enough to feel someone gently but firmly put a hand on my right shoulder.
Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden? it was as if someone put a hand on my shoulder, and then left. my experience with my godmother was gradual at the onset, and the end was abrupt.
Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know? yes, the first experience I had let me know there was a God, not to be scared, and the second also, let me know everything would be ok.
How do you currently view the reality of your experience? Experience was definitely real
Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real: I was not looking for anything, they occurred and then I found out what was going on afterwards
Was the experience dream like in any way? Yes
first one dream like but I was aware of the clock and the time and the second one was not dream like and I was completely aware.
Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience: I cannot explain any emotions for the first one, other than peaceful, but the second one was at first startled, but then calm.
Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience? Yes
What was the best and worst part of your experience? the best was the certainty and peace with both experiences. the worst was trying to explain it and have people take me seriously
Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes Describe: I am an RN, I work in the psychiatric field and as well, with people dying. I can do that because there is hope in a world gone wild. I know who I am, I know where I am going...I know there is a God, a heavenly being that loves me...I felt his love. I know that everyone that is my brother or sister on this earth deserves to have that, and that is why I can do what I do for a living.
Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience? Yes I knew without a doubt there was a God, that we went on, and that death was not to be feared but something to embrace...I now work hospice holding those beliefs
Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.? Yes Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s). Have you ever made such a compact? No
Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later? Yes I found out later, someone died, and later found out my mother had a stroke
What emotions did you feel during the experience? peaceful and safe with the first, the second one was just wondering what that was about
Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others? Uncertain
I had the experience, but before I even knew she had passed away, I was telling my story about having felt like I died and that it was wonderfully peaceful, that there was a God, and I wished I could die again, that there was nothing to be afraid of...my husband woke up to my sharing all of this and thought I had lost it. I continued with the story well into the day and found out that she had died at the same time later the next day.
Did you have any sense of altered space or time? Yes
the first experience definitely
Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose? Yes
Did you become aware of future events? No
Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience? No
Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body? Uncertain
maybe the first time-when I was 20 years old
you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?
Did you see a light? No
Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above? Yes
my first experience seemed to be like a different place in this reality, hard to explain, like a different dimension, not to sound silly
Have you shared this experience with others? Yes
Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher
or web site?
Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience? No
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience? No
Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event? No