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Rhonda S NELE

Experience description:  

The following occurred towards the end of my husbands life and was so remarkable that I am having a hard time dismissing it as tumor related as opposed to some sort of divine intervention.  It's also needed info for what happened after my husbands death in my opinion:

I have always been agnostic. In fact, I've never thought all that much about spirituality one way or another until recently. My husband did not believe in organized religion but kept his personal beliefs close to the vest as he felt such things were a private matter.  I do know from conversations in years past that he did not believe there was anything after death.  My husband, while declining in many ways at the time, was on his feet until the last 8 days of his life.  I would feel very doubtful about what I'm about to share had I not seen it myself.  To make a very long story short, my husband spent the last month of his life looking for 'the door' off and on and after Thanksgiving he was looking for the door adamantly for 18 to 20+ hours a day only resting for short periods.  He was looking for this door all over the house repeatedly though I did try multiple times to tell him that I thought the door would make itself apparent when the time was right.  He appeared to be pressing buttons that weren't there he was flipping light switches on and off among many other things.  Several times he told me 'she' or 'they' were watching us. There were also some very ritualistic appearing 'routines' that he'd been doing multiple times a day, day after day. Eyes closed, deeply concentrating and appearing to be following some sort of instructions. 

My husband passed away on the evening of December 7th.  Later that night, I had an experience that was neither small nor easy to blow off as a coincidence.  One of our smoke alarms chirped.  We've had our dog since 2007 and her usual behavior when one of those things chirp is to get up and go straight to the back door to be let out.  This time however, she got up, crouched down (like a dog that is trying to crawl under something low), then sat up facing the sofa with her head darting around the room, ceiling, kitchen, above the sofa, back to the ceiling - as if she was watching a flying insect but there was positively no flying insect (I looked).  I was absolutely unable to get her attention.  She finally headed for the back door so I went out with her and darned if she didn't continue darting around her head around out on the patio but looking back towards the house and up at the ceiling, etc.  Her behavior continued to be quite strange for several more minutes when she finally settled down.  That said, I did need to change a smoke detector battery; coincidentally, the detector in question happened to be in my husbands media room / man cave.  Could my husband have visited in such a big, attention getting way to let me know that we got it all wrong?  I have not had anything unusual happen since then though I ask every single day for another visit  -  just in case.

Was this experience difficult to express in words?          No

Did you ONLY sense an awareness of presence of the deceased without actually seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling them?       Yes

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?         No

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?           Yes

Left arm; or I think so anyway.  I had the chills and a heightened emotional state during this time so I can't be positive.

           
Was the touch familiar or unfamiliar?  See above

            Was anything communicated by the touch? Not that I'm aware of.

           
Is there any possibility what you felt was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?          n/a

Did you see the deceased?        No

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?   No

How long did the experience last?       I was at least several minutes inside the house and several minutes outside of the house.

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?        Quite sudden; one the smoke detector chirped and our dog go off of the sofa, she was immediately engaged in whatever she seemed to be seeing.

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?           No

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know? No

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?          Experience was probably real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:         I actually don't know whether it was real or not however, it was strikingly abrupt, long lasting and our dog behaved completely out of character.  Very hard to push off as a coincidence so I have been wondering ever since the occurrence.  Nothing further has occurred so far however we haven't even had my husbands service at the time of this writing.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?  No       

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:          Heightened emotions and after I could not get our dog's attention, I actually started talking to my husband.  I was quite tearful as well.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?          Uncertain

I'm not positive that this was real or not.  I mean I know that what I'm writing actually occurred and is hard to explain away but I am still processing it along with my husband's death.  Too soon to say.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?     Well, it gave me hope that there is some sort of existence for my husband although he's gone from this Earth and the worst, my husband is gone from this Earth.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?       No      

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?  Yes     I am re-thinking my spiritual beliefs.  Not necessarily taking up with organized religion but certainly re-thinking things so we shall see.

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?   Uncertain      I'm not positive that this was real or not.  I mean I know that what I'm writing actually occurred and is hard to explain away but I am still processing it along with my husbands death.  Too soon to say.

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have you ever made such a compact? Yes

When we learned that my husband was terminally ill, I told him more than once along the way that if we got it wrong and there is something after death to please, please do his level best to come let me know.  The result was me filling out this form.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?    No
What emotions did you feel during the experience?           Complete wonderment

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?           No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?  No

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?   No

Did you become aware of future events?       No

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?     No

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     No

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?           No

Did you see a light?          No

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above?          No

Have you shared this experience with others?         No      

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?      Yes


I posted a synopsis on a grief support website.

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience? No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No 

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?      No 

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?                     Yes