Tina M's ADC

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Experience description:  

the first time i met my father after he died he was in a room much like a hospital room he was wearing a white gown. i felt i had woken him and he was a little grumpy with me to start with (he was a bit of a grump in life!) i asked him what he was doing being dead? and he said that this was just the way things were. i said that he could sneak out of there with me and come back to life. he got grumpy with me a said no. then he realized that i was upset and he told me not to worry that everything was alright. in my "dream" he looked well, probably as he would have looked if he hadn't been sick for the last few months before he died. he was fatter and his hair was lovely and white instead of the lank greasy grey hair had had before he died.

the second time i met him he was about 38 (my age at the time). he looked fit and healthy. he told me everything was good with him that he really liked the place he was in. he told me to look at him, at how good he looked instead of being sick and unhappy he was now well and happy. then my mother came running in to where we were (it was like an open space, nothing in it.) and started banging him on the chest and crying at him saying why had he left her, why he hadn't come to her instead of me. he didn't say anything to her, but as he turned to her she run away saying that she couldn't do this. he said to me "maybe i should come back. i would be stuck if i did though" i said why would he do that to himself and he said "because i love your mother. you have no idea how much i love her" i asked him why he didn't visit her and he didn't answer me. then i asked him to tell me what it was like where he was. he said it got a bit boring sitting around on fluffy white clouds all day and then winked at me, as if to say "i'm not telling!"

then he asked me did i want to give him a hug goodbye ( i didn't get a chance to do that in life and have been regretting it) i thought that it would be a symbolic hug but i felt his body, i felt his shoulder where my head rested, I felt his shoulders, and i felt his arms around me. and then it all just faded away.

Was this experience difficult to express in words?  No


Did you ONLY sense an awareness of presence of the deceased without actually seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling them?            No

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?          Yes

            Describe what you heard, how clearly you heard it and what was communicated:   i heard his voice.

            Did the voice or sound seem to originate externally or outside of you, inside you, or did you not hear a voice or sound, but had a sense of knowing what was communicated?  it was just like talking to him

            If you heard a voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar from the voice or sound the deceased made when they were alive?           the second time his voice was more gentle than in life

            Is there any possibility what you heard was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           no

            Was there any possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience?   no

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?            Yes

he gave me a hug and i felt his body and arms and the side of his face

            Was the touch familiar or unfamiliar?   totally familiar

            Was anything communicated by the touch?  love, security

            Is there any possibility what you felt was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?  no

Did you see the deceased?         Yes

as stated

            How clearly did the deceased appear?            solid

            How much of the deceased did you see?       all

            Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died?       the first time he was his age.

the second time he was 38.

            How healthy did the deceased appear to be?            he was healthy and well

            Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           no

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?      No

How long did the experience last?        i don't know

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?         don't know

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?           Yes

first time he was a bit annoyed with me, i felt i had disturbed him from a sleep.

the second time he was relaxed for the first time that i can ever remember in his life

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know?  just that he told me he was happy where he was.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?           Experience was probably real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:          i don't know if it's just wishful thinking

            Was the experience dream like in any way?   Yes

it was a dream of sorts.

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:           it just felt like i was talking to dad, it was nice because i hadn't been able to talk to him properly for a long time before he died

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?           Uncertain

i felt happy to have been talking to him but sad that this was going to be the only way that i will ever talk to him again. i still want him here.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      the best part was just being with him. the worst was when he was gone again.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?   Yes

i would feel a bit stronger in my belief of an afterlife

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?            Yes

its made me less fearful of death, and made me feel we are all just here for the experience. its made me feel that anything is possible.

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have you ever made such a compact?        No

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            i was crying in my sleep then when i woke i wanted to sleep again so i could stay talking to him

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?           No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Yes

there was no time and space

Did you see a light?           Uncertain, i was in a bright space

Have you shared this experience with others?        

Yes

my mother. it made her feel better when i told her that he had told me how much he loved her. she believed it to be a visit

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?   No

 Is there anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?       the first time i was actively asking him to visit me. after he did come i was asking him to come again and i was told by a dolphin like creature that i would have communication again but not for 6 months, the second time i wasn't thinking of seeing him at all.

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?            No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No 

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?           Yes 

i have had flying dreams years ago and i have felt an overwhelming sense of knowing what the whole thing was about. it only lasted minutes.

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes