Experience description:

As I left the bathroom and entered the kitchen, Leo was sitting in the kitchen on a bench. I was fully awake and unaware that my grandmother was sick and dying at the same time. I had never seen or talked to my grandmother in my life.

Leo was sitting on the bench in full body form. He had on all of the clothes I remember him wearing when I was young. The red and black plaid hat, red and black plaid shirt, bib overalls, and brown leather boots. Also, he was smoking a hand rolled cigarette (just like he did when I saw him as a child). Although he appeared in a spirit like form, the coloring of his hat and shirt were a very bright black and red (his bibs bright blue, his boots bright brown). The smoke from the cigarette even seemed real. He was surrounded by a bright white light that gave off a calming, loving feeling. Although I wanted to touch him, I could not move. I stood about 5 or 6 feet in front of him. The feeling was so kind and loving that I wanted to go with him (I could not move). It all only lasted a few seconds, but it is still vivid in my mind.

After 30 years, every detail remains vivid in my mind. When I think about the visit (and I do often), I can still feel the love and peace that I felt at the time of the visit. I have no fear of death. After the visit, I did mention it to my father and asked him if he thought I should tell my mother. He said, yes. When I described the visit to both my mother and father, I was very surprised at how open they both were to the visit (I thought they might not believe me). My mother said, if anyone would come for your grandmother it would be Leo. My mother and father both believed me (I was relieved by that). I have never told anyone else about the visit.

Background Information:

Date of experience: In 1995

Was this experience difficult to express in words? Yes Will people believe me? Words cannot express the true feeling of love, peace felt by the experience. It is like something beyond are ability to fully understand or explain.

Did you ONLY sense an awareness of presence of the deceased without actually seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling them? No

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased? No

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased? No

Did you see the deceased? Yes They looked just like I remembered them as a child (last time I saw them). They looked spirit like (but very real to life looking). Their clothing was in bright colors, and they were surrounded by a bright white light that gave off a very strong loving, calming, peaceful feeling. Such love and warm that I wanted to go with them! Although I wanted to tough them, I could move (it was like someone had loving arms around me). When I wanted to go with, is when the image stated to fade and soon it was gone.

How clearly did the deceased appear? Very clear (life like). Like a spirit but very real looking (hard to explain) They appeared just like I remembered them as a child. So warm and beautiful (full of love, happiness, and peace). So beautiful that words cannot describe how it made me feel.

How much of the deceased did you see? Full body. It looked and felt like he (Leo) was sitting there in my kitchen. I was and still am sure that he was.

Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died? No, he appeared to be about 60 years old (the last time I had seen him alive at my grandfather's funeral).

How healthy did the deceased appear to be? Very healthy, peaceful, and happy.

Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience? No, absolutely not.

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased? Yes

What smell, scent, fragrance or odor did you smell? cigarette smoke

Was the smell, scent, fragrance or odor familiar? Yes, I remember smelling the same strong-smelling hand rolled cigarette smell as a child. When I was a child, I never saw Leo without a hand rolled cigarette in his mouth (even when they would burn out, he had it in his mouth).

Was anything communicated by the smell? I think the smell communicated the same thing the clothing did. It was definitely Leo.

Is there any possibility that the smell, scent, fragrance or odor was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience? No

How long did the experience last? just a few seconds.

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden? When I entered the room (kitchen) he was sitting there on the bench. As it ended, he slowly faded away.

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased? Yes Very happy, loving, peaceful.

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know? He didn't speak. He did come the night my grandmother passed (I didn't know until the next day). He didn't directly give me information. He did leave me with the knowledge of an afterlife (what a gift this was).

Did you believe in ADCs prior to your experience? absolutely not

Do you believe in ADCs now? Absolutely

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? Believed it probably could happen

Do you now believe in an afterlife?Absolutely

Did you believe in God or a Supreme Being prior to your experience? Believed God probably exists

Do you now believe in God or a Supreme Being? Absolutely

Were you afraid of death before your experience? Moderately fearful

Are you afraid of death now? Not fearful

How do you currently view the reality of your experience? Experience was definitely real It could have been nothing but real. The way it made me feel (full of love and peace) when it happened and even now 30 years later. It felt and still feels as real as anything I have ever witnessed. I was fully awake, I had not thought about Leo or anything connected to Leo or death prior to the visit. It was 100% a total surprise. It was a real as the words I am typing.

Was the experience dream like in any way? No

What did you feel (while awake) immediately prior to your experience? Happy

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience: So peaceful, I felt such love (love that words cannot explain), happy.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience? Yes Yes, beyond feeling so happy and thankful for the visit (I believe it was a gift from God). When I heard the next day that my grandmother had crossed over, I felt a closeness to her (even thou I didn't even know her). The emptiness (the hole) inside me was gone and I felt nothing but love and a close connection to my grandmother (I know this sounds crazy).

What was the best and worst part of your experience? The best part is the beautiful loving, peaceful, and calmness feeling that filled my heart and stills remains there 30 years later. The worst part is that I couldn't go with (the light is so full of love that every part of you wants to follow the light).

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes Describe: I still belief that religion is manmade (so many different kinds of religions in the world). I am not more religious. I am more spiritual. My believe in God and the afterlife is at a max.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience? Yes 100% belief in God, the afterlife, and that peace and love are on the other side.

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.? Yes During the visit, I felt like I had touched the hand of God. There is an afterlife (I am so thankful for the knowledge)

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s). Have you ever made such a compact? No

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? happiness, peace, thankful, fearless.

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others? No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time? No

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose? No

Did you become aware of future events? No

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience? No

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body? No

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased? No

Did you see a light? Yes The bright light surrounded Leo during the visit. It felt like the love, peace, and calmness was coming from that light. Although it was very bright, I could look straight at it. It was a very bright white light with a fading beautiful light blue around the center of the light (the part of the light that circled Leo).

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above? No

Have you shared this experience with others? Yes I did share it with both my father and mother. They both seemed to believe me. My mother who was on the outs with her mother most of her adult life was happy for the visit. She said, if anyone would come for her mother, it would be Leo. My mother also shared an ADC that her grandmother shared with her when she was young. I was very surprised to hear this (my mother had never talked like this before). My mother's grandmother couldn't find some important papers after right after her husband died. He appeared in a dream and told her where the papers were.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site? No Response

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience? No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience? No

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event? No

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes

Please offer any suggestions you may have to improve this questionnaire. I think your questions were perfect! I am so glad that I found your website so that I could share this beautiful story. I've been carrying it around for 30 years and it feels very good to share it with people that I know will believe and appreciate it.