My husband and our two kids (at that time) were living in a remote part of Alaska for his job.  It was a temporary assignment.  We were away from all of our family who lived in 'the lower 48.'  My Dad's mom was a special person to me because she always cared about me and what I thought/felt about things.  We used to talk for hours.  I lived with her for several summers during my teenage years and stayed with her most weekends during college.  After Grandpa (her husband) died, she told me that she saw him walking down their hallway toward her recliner chair where she used to sleep one night.  He was himself, but she could see through him.  He walked up to her and asked her if she was all right.  She said she was and then he was gone.

I remembered this story she had shared with me when she died.  I was hoping she would come visit me.  Grandma had been in the hospital for several weeks recovering from heart bypass surgery.  She developed pneumonia there and died.  I was unable to visit her in the hospital because I couldn't leave my young children alone while my husband worked all day.  I called her every day and we talked about the hospital and how she was doing.  When she died, I was able to fly back for the funeral which was held on a Saturday.  My husband was home with our kids.  The funeral was a precious time for me because I loved talking about her and hearing all the stories of how kind and loving she was. 

After flying back to my husband and kids, I became very sad.  I missed her so much and the finality of her death seemed too much to bear.  I used to look forward to seeing her and would hold onto our visits in my heart.  One night while sleeping, I had a very lucid dream that I remember so clearly.  I was standing about 10 feet outside a group of about 8 people who were all standing in a circle.  They weren't regular people. They were beautiful, lovely, kind and strong people who were shining bright.  They were talking together and sometimes singing.  I watched them for awhile, amazed at what I was seeing.  Then the one closest to me, whose back was to me at the time, turned around and walked to me.  She was so pretty--lovely long hair and a kind face.  She walked right up to me and started talking to me.  I felt ashamed to talk to such an amazing person and was surprised that she would have anything to tell me.  We talked for hours.  I should say that she talked to me for hours.  She had many things to say about my life and my purpose on Earth.  She told me things about the future of our planet.  I asked questions and she answered them.  I don't remember anything she said except for one sentence. 

I was feeling joy and peace while talking with her, but I didn't know who she was.  Then she told me I had to leave and I said I wanted to stay and talk some more.  Just then she kind of shimmered a bit or her outer self rippled and I saw her as my Grandma so briefly, just a glimpse.  I cried out, Grandma---it's you!  She didn't look at all like herself on earth.  She was always a bit heavy and short.  There, she was tall, trim, young, with long hair.  I had seen pictures of her when she was younger, and she didn't look like those at all.  But I saw a glimpse of her as herself and also as this beautiful lady and my heart rushed with love and amazement.  I was leaving and she said, 'It's all about Jesus.'  

I woke up in the morning feeling at peace.  I had no more sadness, just mild loneliness.  I knew that she was doing really well and that made me happy.  I've really wondered about her appearance and why I didn't know it was her until the very end.  I wish I could remember more of what we talked about.  I understood her sentence to mean that everything in life is to be focused on Jesus and for Him.

Was this experience difficult to express in words?          No

Did you ONLY sense an awareness of presence of the deceased without actually seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling them?      No

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?          No

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?         No

Did you see the deceased?       Yes

Grandma was entirely unrecognizable at first.  She was a beautiful, tall, young, trim being with long, wavy hair.  In life, she was shorter than me, heavy, with short hair.

            How clearly did the deceased appear?            She was shining brightly and somewhat transparent.

            How much of the deceased did you see?       All of her.

            Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died?           She appeared much younger--probably in her mid twenties.  She was 76 when she died.

            How healthy did the deceased appear to be?            So healthy--young, vital, strong.  Her short and slightly humped over frame was gone, but i saw a glimpse of her in a shimmer or ripple of the beautiful body.

            Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?   no, I was asleep.

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased? No

How long did the experience last?      It felt like hours.  It must have only been a short time because I woke up from the dream and it was morning.

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?       Beginning was gradual, I was sleeping and this dream emerged in my mind.  I gradually became aware of this ring of people and what they were doing.  It ended suddenly.

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?          Yes

She was happy, joyful, complete, at peace, loving, at home.

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know?  I received a lot of information.  I remember thinking things in my dream like, 'ok, so that's the plan.' But I don't remember a single thing except for the statement that 'everything is about Jesus.'

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?          Experience was definitely real

          Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:   I think it was real because everything was so vivid and I remember all the details so many years later.  Also, my grandma was talking to me for so long and I didn't realize it was her until the very end.  I'm sure that if I had created the circumstance in my mind as a false encounter, I would have her looking like herself or at least like her younger self.  It felt a bit disconcerting to only realize it was her at the very end.

          Was the experience dream like in any way?  Yes

It was a dream because I was asleep.  But it was real because it was an interaction that changed my emotions from sadness to peace.  I can't remember any other dream I've ever had in such explicit detail.  Occasionally, I'll remember some highlights of a dream like, it took place in the mountains, or I was a teacher.  But I don't remember any dreams like this.

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:  I felt humbled and small at first.  The people seemed important and I felt like a child.  Then I felt peace and love when she was talking to me.  I felt the satisfaction of learning important things, like gobbling up truth.  Then I felt total amazement and joy when I realized that I was with my grandma the whole time.  I was so happy and excited to see her, yet confused about who she really was.  Then I was disappointed to leave.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience? Yes

My sadness ended.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?          Seeing my grandma again was the absolute best part.  She was so happy and beautiful!  The worst part was leaving and forgetting everything she said.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes                Describe:     I'm not afraid of dying.  I try to live for Jesus.  Before, I probably cared too much about what others thought about me, what stuff I had, etc.  It's taken many years, but her words have stayed prominent in my mind and I believe they've changed my outlook on life.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?      Yes    I'm sure life goes on after death and it gets a lot better!

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?         Yes    I know there is life after death now.  I also know that Jesus is the most important part of life.

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have you ever made such a compact?    No

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No
What emotions did you feel during the experience?          peace and acceptance of her death.  Joy in knowing she was doing so well.  Regret that I couldn't remember what we talked about.

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?          No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?  Yes

Time.  It felt like hours of talking happened.  I don't know how I know this, I just felt like it was a good, long talk lasting many hours.

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?         Yes

I really wish I could remember anything!

Did you become aware of future events?      Yes

I was aware of my future, but then I forgot all of it. So I can't gauge any accuracy.

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?      Yes

This is strange, but one time I felt the deceased mother of one of my professors come to me and it felt like she wanted me to tell him (her son) about Jesus.  I thought it was crazy.  But this presence was with me in my office at school for many days, always behind me.  I ended up giving him a book about Jesus and talking with him one time.  After I did that, I never felt that presence again.  But he died a year later.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?   Yes

I was not in physical form.  I was talking to her but I was kind of floating.  I only remember this in retrospect as I try to recall any physical sensations.  I didn't take the time to try and assess my own physical self because I was so enthralled with what I was observing.Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?  Yes

There were about 7 other beings there in a circle with her.  They were men and women.  I didn't recognize anyone, but I felt like at least two of them knew me.   A man and another lady in the circle looked at me and smiled and I thought they seemed familiar somehow.  But I don't know who they were.  It seemed like the circle of people were communicating among themselves.  Whatever they were saying was important because they were really focused on their task.  I interrupted them and felt ashamed for doing so.  They all looked at me when my grandma came over to me.  They were happy to stop what they were doing, but I felt ashamed.

Did you see a light?        No

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above?     No

Have you shared this experience with others?       Yes    I told my dad who laughed at me.  I told my husband who said, 'interesting.'

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?         No

 Is there anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?   No, thank you.

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?          No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?       No 

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event? Yes 

I had that feeling of the presence of my professor's mother described above. That was bizarre because I hadn't known her and yet I knew it was her. 

When I was young, I once saw two angels walking shoulder-to-shoulder down the hallway in our house.  They were tall and fierce-looking.  They had swords and long, white robes.  They walked past my bedroom door and kept walking toward my parents' room. They looked at me, but they didn't acknowledge me. They were talking together, moving their hands. One was in charge and telling the other one something important.  I was in my bed in the middle of the night and looked up and saw them.  I watched them for just a minute and then covered my head with my blanket because I was scared when they looked at me.  I peeked out after awhile and they were gone.

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?           Yes

Please offer any suggestions you may have to improve this questionnaire.       no, thank you.