My mother had been suffering from a heart condition and ultimately passed away from congestive heart failure after an unsuccessful heart transplant operation. I missed my mother a lot and I remember before her funeral looking at her body and I thought how it was just a body and I wondered where my mother had gone.

I didn't realise until a few years later that in the month following her death I couldn't understand that she was gone, I would imagine that I saw her when out walking around my town only to realise that it wasn't her. I also remember how, one night over dinner with my one of my cousin's and her mother to celebrate my cousin's birthday, I realized that I would never get a chance to have this kind of relationship with my mother again. I found it so difficult to connect with my emotions but underneath the shock of my mother's passing, I was suffering. I was 18 years old and a few months later I turned 19 years old.

One night I went to sleep and I was dreaming of my home being under attack, black crows tried to enter through the windows but the windows were on springs and wouldn't stay closed unless I held them fast. This was definitely a dream and the next scene in the dream I was walking up the road where I lived and everything was calm. Suddenly, in the dream my mother appeared in front of me. Whilst my mother was alive and due to her heart condition, she had lost so much weight she was practically skin and bone. I remember how my father would cut off the labels of her clothing so nobody would know that she wore children's clothing, that's how thin she had become.

However, my mother wasn't part of my dream, she appeared and she was young again, like how she looked in photos when she got married. Her face was full and it looked like her skin was made of light. My mother was wearing a forest green sari (she loved wearing this style of Indian clothing when she was alive). My mother didn't speak to me but she simply looked at me and she smiled.

The next thing I knew, I was awake in my bed. I remember how the sunlight was coming into my room. Suddenly, from the top of my head and all the way down through my body I felt such love, it was like being bathed in unconditional love. Afterwards I couldn't find any words to describe that love and words just seem inadequate. It is a love I have never experienced in this world, the closest I can do is say that perfect peace is perfect love.

Whilst this was happening I was aware that there were other beings or souls overlapping like discs, interconnected and endless were experiencing the same love with me and there was no separation but they were also individual but we all shared this love. There was no time, when I was 18 years old I described this experience to an Aunt afterwards and I explained that I couldn't say if it was one minute or all of eternity. I still do this day can't describe how that's possible but there was just no time.

Slowly, the experience faded and I lay blinking on my mind. What's also unusual is that I was completely calm and the whole experience felt completely natural. It's only many years later looking back that I realized how out of the ordinary it all was.

I believe that my mother came to visit me to comfort me and to show me that she was doing just more than fine on the other side. I've never seen her look so well, she was literally glowing and a healthy weight again. She never spoke any words but her smile let me know.

People have questioned the validity of what I experienced over the years and I didn't know about NDE's, OBE's or STE's but I know that it was REAL, clear as day and I believe we do not die and that we live on.

My mother suffered from her illness for so many years, she could never play sports with other children, she could never run and after she died it broke my heart to think how much she had suffered. I know now that after she died, she was freer and happier than she had been on this earthly life and that is a great, great comfort to me. I'm forever grateful that she came to me to let me know.

At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event?   No 

Was the experience difficult to express in words?  Yes     It is difficult to describe the love I felt and how perfect it was. It's also impossible to describe how there was no time. I can't even tell you if the experience was one minute or infinite minutes, I really can't!

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?      I saw my mother and from that moment I was completely conscious and aware that the dream was no longer a dream. After that on waking I was completely conscious and everything happened at the same time (although there was no time).

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness?      Normal consciousness and alertness   I was completely conscious but it was a normal level of consciousness that we experience in everyday life.

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   My vision was the same as my everyday vision

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   My hearing was normal. I felt the experience, there was no sound.

Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?   No  

What emotions did you feel during the experience?   I felt a beautiful love spread through my entire body, from my head downwards. It was calm and full of love. I understood that perfect peace is perfect love.  

Did you pass into or through a tunnel?   No  

Did you see an unearthly light?   No  

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice?   No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)?   No  

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings?   Yes   I saw my mother in the dream realm but apart from my unconscious dream state.

Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience?   No  

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world?   No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down?   Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
I have described that there was no time above.

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything?   No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?   No

Did you come to a border or point of no return?   No

Did scenes from the future come to you?  No 

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness suggesting that there either is (or is not) continued existence after earthly life (“life after death”)?   Yes   I have described this already in my main account of the experience.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that God or a supreme being either does (or does not) exist?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that you either did (or did not) exist prior to this lifetime?   Yes   I became aware of a perfect love that for some reason we don't experience here. I also experienced many infinite beings like me (souls) who were connected to me. I understood that we are all connected and never apart from one another.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that a mystical universal connection or unity/oneness either does (or does not) exist?   Yes   I've described this already. I experienced other souls.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s meaning or purpose?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s difficulties, challenges, or hardships?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding love?   Yes   I've already described this in my main account.

During your experience, did you encounter any other specific information / awareness that you have not shared in other questions that is relevant to living our earthly lives?   No  

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose?   No  

What occurred during your experience included:   Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience  

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience?   I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience   My Aunt recounted to me that after the meal we shared on my cousin's birthday, they had dropped me off back home and that as soon as I got inside my house I ran upstairs and into the bathroom, locked the door and was crying hysterically. All I can remember from that night was looking at my Aunt and cousin and realising that the love they shared I would never share with my mother ever again. At that moment, I think my mind cut me off from that memory and the emotions in order to protect me. I was shocked when my Aunt told me and if she hadn't have told me, I would never have remembered it. However, a month later or thereabout I had a vision of my mother and I've always remembered it and have never forgotten it.

Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your experience:   After this experience, after several years I questioned the meaning of our lives and went through a period of depression and therapy. At the same time I met my Guru and since then and looking back on my experience after my mother died, I believe that we are not alone and that God is always with us. I no longer have the fear I once had that everything in my life was down to me. I live my life now trying to do my best but understanding that God will always be there with me and so will all of the others.

My experience directly resulted in:   No changes in my life

Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that occurred as a result of the experience?   No  

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience?   No  

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you?     Seeing my mother again, I was so sad she was gone.

Have you ever shared this experience with others?   Yes  A few days later I shared it with my Aunt and then over the years I also shared it with another Aunt who told me that when her mother had passed away her sister had seen her mother in a dream and that she was young again. My Aunt told me she believes that after we die, we become young again. I believe this too and believe that age is just something we experience here and not as souls.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?   No  

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:   Experience was definitely real   It was definitely real, up until a few years ago if someone questioned my experience I didn't say anything but now I tell them, I know the difference between being asleep and dreaming and being awake and I was completely awake when my experience happened!

What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time:   Experience was definitely real   I've already explained this above.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?   No  

Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?   No  

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience?   No  

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience?   No, that's everything. Reading everybody else's NDE on here made me realize the importance of sharing my STE with you all.

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?   Yes