I've always struggled with life. It's unbearable to watch the agony in this world and the things that people go through. Because of this I've always been interested in Near Death Experiences because reading about them makes me aware that there is a higher purpose and therefore I feel slightly better about the horrible things that happen. I have two friends, Sara and Collette who are married. I work with Sara and we constantly discuss life. Sara doesn't believe in God really so I always tell her about NDEs. Sara and Collette came over for taco night with me and my husband. The topic of NDEs came up and Collette told us that she had one when she was 5. She said that ever since, she sees spirits and hates it.  It's scary and she always tries to block it out.

The night went on and we changed topics. Collette went to the bathroom. When she came out, she was different and she came and sat right next to me and said, "Robin I have to tell you something. I saw your Dad and he told me to tell you that he loves you and is proud of you". She said that she conveyed to him that there is no way that I would believe her considering what we've been discussing. She said that he told her, "tell her I'm wearing a brown suit". When she said that I instantly knew it was indeed him. She said, "it's a brown tweed suit, and he's tall, has a deep voice and salt and pepper hair". My Dad has always had salt and pepper hair (my whole life) and was tall and had a distinguished deep voice. She said this is the first time that seeing a spirit wasn't scary, and that it was all a good feeling. My Dad rarely wore suits. In fact I've never seen him in a suit but I knew it was him when she said that because he passed away a year and three months prior to this and I was the one closest to him and I chose a brown tweed suit which my brother agreed to for cremation. We took this suit to the mortuary and it was torturous to look at. I snapped a picture with my phone and had the picture stored in my cloud. I told Collette, "hold on while I find the picture of his suit". I had to go through a year and three months worth of pictures and as I was scrolling I came across a picture of my Dad in a suit and he was at my sisters wedding which I didn't go to. Collette said, "that's him but it's not that suit". I knew it wasn't but the fact that she said that was more confirmation. Then I came across the picture with his clothes on the mortuary table. She said, "yep, that's the suit!!". I asked for more detail of how it happened. She said she was using the restroom (sitting) and that she was looking up to the right at a picture on the wall when she felt a presence to her left. She said he was standing there and she wasn't scared or embarrassed and that he spoke to her. She said it wasn't audible but she could "hear his voice in her head" and that they communicated "telepathically". She said that at the end he smiled.

Was this experience difficult to express in words?          No

How long did the experience last?       Maybe 3 minutes

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?        Sudden

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know? He gave her information that she did not know

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?          Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:            There is no way of her knowing that he was wearing a brown tweed suit

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:          Chills went down my body when she said, "he told me to tell you he's wearing a brown suit". I instantly knew it was really him. The mortuary was 800 miles away, she would have no way of knowing.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?          Yes

He passed away after a rough bout of dementia. They say dementia ruins the relationship with loved ones prior to loved ones realizing that they have dementia. This was true in my case as his dementia caused him to write me very hateful letters about my family (my family is biracial). I stuck by him even after the letters but it literally tore me apart and I didn't know that the letters were from the dementia until after he passed and I had time to reflect and make sense of it all. We also had an argument the last time I saw him (2 weeks before he passed) because his dementia caused him to be very mean and I wasn't good at handling it. His visit heals all of it and made me know that it is all ok.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?     The best is confirmation. The worst is the wait.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?       Yes                 Describe:            I know now that I have to absolutely focus on people and unconditional love, because it's all true- we are here for a purpose.